Philosophy

[Bob Willson]

Right on, Andy Rooney! Andy Rooney said on 60 minutes a few weeks back: (for those of you that don't know Andy Rooney, he is an 82 year old US TV commentator)

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens. Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law of Probability.

I believe that if you are selling me a milk shake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours. I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry self if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building. Ask your buddy that invented the Internet to help you. (Al)

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa; so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I am proud to be from America and nowhere else.

And if you don't like my point of view, tough. DON'T PASS IT ON!!
Jatis

[Iain]

Are you trying to put Descartes before de whores? (Womens prison joke)

[Ben from Vic.]

Sounds good to me.

[Bob Willson]

A reprint from here


Background: An accomplice wrote: Well, there is one fact. As Rene Descartes put it, "I think, therefore I am." (Or is that I drink, therefore I am?). I chose to disagree.




There have been some problems in the translation. It may have been "I pink, therefore I Spam", "I sink therefore I swam", or even "I stink therefore I swam". Once, when the wheels came off Descartes, he whimpered "I kink, therefore I cam". It was a hard axle to follow.

But in fact, Descartes said it in Latin, and it was: "Cogs I tow, ergo sump", leading Wittgenstein later to pen his opus on intelligent agricultural implements, "Tractoratus Logico-philosophicus". The tractoratus later took up travelling in an obsessive way, and became the first touring machine when Wittgenstein tried to negatively gear it. (Some people may doubt this: I draw your attention to the first line of the Tractoratus, which reads "The world is all that is the Massey-Ferguson". Later editions have another version (The world is all that is the Case"), after his sponsorship deal broke down, but I quote the original.)

Descartes next experimented with galvanoplasty, a means of coating entire dead pigs in a layer of metal (to be marketed with the slogan "I zinc, therefore I ham"), but then found that Galvani and Volta had not yet invented the battery.

Crazed by his failed attempts to get electricity from battery hens linked with chicken wire (the wire was slow, while the electrons all travelled faster than a speeding pullet), Descartes suffered multiple personality disorders and ended up as a vegetable ("I cinq, therefore I yam"), inspiring Wittgenstein once more. Many people thought Wittgenstein was into shovels, but it was actually potatoes that caught his fancy when he observed that he believed in calling a spud a spud, adding "thank heavens for small murphies", whereon his friends chortled hoe hoe, hence the confusion, but they were a bunch of rakes anyhow.

Wittgenstein did in fact engage in a soft-shoe shovel, every now and then, and he was familiar with cinematographer Charles Shovel, saying that 40 thousand horsemen can't be wrong - a comment that was later corrupted to 50 thousand Frenchmen, and attributed to Descartes, who did not, in spite of rumours, pay ladies of easy virtue to follow him around Paris, so that people would say "there goes Descartes before the whores". I hope this clarifies matters.

[RETIRED]

Oh Dear, some people have so much time on their hands. But I do like it

[AlexS]

Very good, Bob. However, I have it on good authority that Descartes did pay ladies of easy virtue to follow him around, and would often announce his arrival with a flourish of strumpets.

[Bob Willson]

.

[ozwinner]

Thats not a smilie, this is a smilie!



Al

[bitingmidge]

Al,

How can I remain anonymous when you keep posting portraits for the whole world to see? :mad:

P

[Bob Willson]

OK Al, you win.

[Iain]

a flourish of strumpets.

Ahem Should that not be a pride of loins?
Ozwinner Picasso? Is it an original?

[ozwinner]

Ahem Should that not be a pride of loins?
Ozwinner Picasso? Is it an original?

Thats a piccy the wife took of me when I whacked me finger with a hammer.

Al