> > Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their
> local
> > golf
> > course when a chap carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind
if
> > join you? My partner didn't turn up."
> >
> > "Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed
> > the
> > game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course, one of
> the
> > friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"
> > "I'm a hit man," was the reply.
> > "You're joking!" was the response.
> > "No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a
> > beautiful
> > Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my
tools."
> >
> > "That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I
take
> a
> > look? I think I might be able to see my house from here." So he picked
up
> > the
> > rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house.
> >
> > "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see
> > right in
> > the window."
> >
> > "Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's naked!
> > What's
> > that? Wait a minute, that's my neighbour in there with her .......
> > He's naked as well! The bitch!"
> >
> > He turned to the hitman, "How much do you charge for a hit?"
> > "I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the
> > trigger."
> >
> > "Can you do two for me now?"
> > "Sure, what do you want?"
> > "First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the
> mouth.
> > Then
> > the neighbor, he's a mate of mine, a bit of a lad, so just shoot his
dick
> > off to
> > teach him a lesson."
> >
> > The hitman took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a
> > fewminutes.
> >
> > "Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.
> > "Just wait a moment, be patient," said the hitman calmly, "I think I can
> > save
> > you a grand here....."
> >
>