Comprehensive Legal Service

[Barry Hicks]

A reclusive, elderly spinster arranged for a solicitor to
call at her house to discuss her estate and her will.

The lawyer asked, "Would you please tell me what you
have in asssets and how you would like them to be
distributed under your will?"

She replied, "Besides this house and contents, I have
$40,000 in my bank account."

"How would you like the $40,000 to be distributed?"
asked the solicitor.

"Well'," said the old lady, "I have led a reclusive life and
people have hardly noticed me so I would like them to
notice me when I pass on. I would like to spend $35,000
on my funeral."

The solicitor replied, "A $35,000 funeral will certainly make
people notice you. What would you like to do with the
remaining $5,000?"

The spinster said, "As you know, I've never married. I've
lived alone most of my life and in fact, I have never slept
with a man. Before I die, I would like you to use the
$5,000 to arrange for a man to sleep with me."

"That's a very unusual request," the lawyer said, "but I'll
see what I can do to arrange it and get back to you."

That evening, the lawyer was at home telling his wife about
the eccentric spinster and her weird request.

After thinking about how much she could do around the
house with $5,000 and with a bit of coaxing, she got her
husband to agree to provide the service himself. "I'll drive
you over tomorrow morning and wait in the car until you've
finished."

The next morning, she drove him to the spinster's house
and waited while he went inside. She waited for over an
hour and when her husband didn't come out, she blew the
car horn. An upstairs window opened and the lawyer stuck
his head out and yelled, "Pick me up in the morning, she is
going to let the State bury her."

[fenderbelly]

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