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Thread: In Memorium
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12th September 2006, 10:58 PM #1
In Memorium
In memory of my father, who died today 12 months ago. My dad was a builder with over 40 years in the trade.
He started out when roofs were still cut out by hand, and ended up as a carpenter, plasterer, concreter, tiler, roofer, cabinetmaker, stonemason etc. As far as I know, he was one of the last ones in this town that could work out a roof (not trusses) Since mid 1970, he had no contact by telephone, and no advertising, all his work was by word of mouth, and he still had people lining up everywhere to get him to do work for them. He was still working up to the day he died. I used to work with him, till I got retail employment. There is still so much that I would like to ask him, and so much knowledge that went with him. He could be a hard man, but he was fair.
I still miss him, and always will, he was one of the best men that I will ever know. R.I.P. Dad
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12th September 2006, 11:07 PM #2
So was my Dad, and I'm sure the fathers of lots of members of this forum. Great men, all of them. But they would also be saying, "Son, get on with it".
That's what they went through when they lost their fathers too. Life goes on and you should be happy in the fact that you carry your father's memory, his ideas, his attitude and his disciplins with you. He'd then say "Look at my boy. i'm happy i did a good job there".
Celebrate his life. Don't mourn his passing, Cherish his memory as you obviously do and be happy that you had a good relationship with him. Pass his thoughts and way of living to your own children and he would be proud.
It happens to us all.
And good on you for honouring his memory by posting your thoughts.If at first you don't succeed, give something else a go. Life is far too short to waste time trying.
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12th September 2006, 11:29 PM #3
Gumby,
I wrote this as a tribute to him, and what he means to me. I carry my fathers memory with me, and cherish it.
I mourn his passing, in that I mourn that I and his friends have lost a good man forever. I also accept that he had to go sometime, and am glad that he went without pain, and that he lived his life the way he wanted to.
I have continued on in my life, (hopefully) in the way that he would wish. He always told me to make up my own mind, and do what is best.
If he had ever said "Son, get on with it", I would have belted him one, being his only daughter.
He was, and always will be a big part of my life, I hold true to the values that he has taught me by example.
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12th September 2006, 11:33 PM #4.
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12th September 2006, 11:57 PM #5
I hope you enjoyed your time together and remember it well.
My sympathy on his passing.
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13th September 2006, 12:03 AM #6
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13th September 2006, 12:20 AM #7Senior Member
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Tameriska,
When Gumby put his foot (and his calf and his thigh well and truely) in it, it seemed to me he made a "peau faux", so much worse than a "feau paux".
We are aware that we can get by when we put our foot in our mouth, albeit with difficuty, but when we put both feet in our mouths, we do not have a leg to stand on.
In fairness, I think that all the readers were touched that your father had attained that degree of respect of you for him that you wanted to share with us the regard you had for him, one year after what was obviously a sad loss. All that you said, though, emphasises how the good lives on and any evil is interred with the body.
May your positive thoughts continue and may his legacy continue.
I would be touched to think my children would be saying such things about me after I have gone.CJ
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly Anon
Be the change you wish to see in the world Ghandi
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13th September 2006, 12:29 AM #8
Gumby Thats fine Sir, (curtseys).
I appreciate your reply
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13th September 2006, 01:24 AM #9Senior Member
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Shucks, truth and public benefit.
CJ
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly Anon
Be the change you wish to see in the world Ghandi
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13th September 2006, 05:30 PM #10Deceased
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I was touched by your post, unfortunately my father never did any woodworking so wasn't able to pass on any of those skills. But he passed on the values by which I live for which I'm extremely grateful. I also remember him fondly.
Originally Posted by tameriska
Remember the forum rule, if there are no pics it didn't happen.
Peter.
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14th September 2006, 07:16 AM #11
Isn't that one of the hardest things to face up to: no opportunity to check with him on how you do this or that - or get an opinion on a project. We are so used to just picking up a phone. Still... late one night, when I didn't know there was an off switch lock on my (new) table saw , I reckon I could hear him yelling at me in exasperation - "you turn it to release, what are you!"
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14th September 2006, 12:28 PM #12
Well I never knew my old man... but mum? now there was a different kettle of fish she was our mum our dad our friend and our mentor when she left Nov 4 2003 there was created a massive hole in our lives... she didnt know a thing about carpentry nothing whatever about wood except she loathed chipboard with a passion but she knew many other things that she passed on to us kids even if we didnt know it at the time
I know she wouldnt want me to be posting a thread about her a year after her passing she'd be up there watchin and shakin her golden locks sayin "Get yer ass into gear son be the best you can and stop cryin Im gone your livin so LIVE"
not havin a go just wonderin why? Im sure your dad was your hero my girl Im sure of it thanks to your words but wouldnt you do better to create something as a memorial to him a "thanks for the lessons dad"? create a marquetry picture of him perhaps? a perfect frame and insert his photo doin somethin he enjoyed... preferably something with you by his side?... up on a roof puttin together the framework smilin at you? I dont know but I know when I created the memorial plaque for my mum it became a salve for my loss and a gallery of her joy in life the kids all look at it and wonder at the changes that life wraught in her but still see "Nanna" in the smile and twinkling eyes... maybe something like that would help you?
Sorry must be havin a bit of an off dayBelieve me there IS life beyond marriage!!! Relax breathe and smile learn to laugh again from the heart so it reaches the eyes!!
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14th September 2006, 11:29 PM #13
Wild Dingo, My Dad would be the same, telling me to get on with my life.
I've already done my crying over him.
The reason why I posted this, was basically a tribute to him, and what he meant to me. He never liked anyone knowing when his birthday was, and hated it when someone once put his name in the local paper. I basically chose to post on here because is is still relatively anonomous. He was a private person, and all the people that he mattered to would have remembered by themselves, without reminding them in the paper.
I do intend to make something out of timber to memoralize him, probably a casket. The problem with making a picture frame/ marquetry etc is that it has been very hard finding pictures of him, think I have about 10 all up, from different sources, mostly old ones, as he hated his picture being taken.
The difficulty with making a timber memorial to him at this point is that I still have 3 sheds to sort out, with 3 decades of accumulation. His workshop is still set up, but trying to make room, as well as trying to decipher the workings of machinery from the 70's, how to change blades, adjustments etc before I am game to use them again.
I am trying to do this when I can, but it is going to be a fair while before I can get the spare time to do this. At the moment I am trying to keep up the maitenece? on a 1950' s builders house (dont buy a builders house/ mechanics car), work, as well as having to light the fire/ split timber each night to cook and get hot water.
I am getting there slowly, I have found the members to be very informative and helpful, and they have given me many ideas and solutions, basically I wanted to share with the forum the person who made me what I am. (must have had too many sambukas tonight
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