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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2004
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    Sunshine Coast Queensland
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    Default You Gotta Love Kids

    An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an airplane and he turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."

    The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"

    "Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?" as he smiled smugly.

    "Okay," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"

    The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don't know ####?"

    And then she went back to reading her book.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Melbourne
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    Default

    Not a bad one, read it before except it was the other way around. The man was a priest, or so it went...
    -Scott

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Sunshine Coast Queensland
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    Default

    You've just given me an idea, I should use this next time the mormans come calling...

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    lower eyre peninsular
    Age
    75
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    496

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by smidsy View Post
    You've just given me an idea, I should use this next time the mormans come calling...
    Mate of mine cured them for all time well the man he did anyway.

    He's into weight lifting, one saturday wife and kids gone shopping and he spies 2 mormans coming up drive, thinks very quickly, strips to the buff, one hand on the door handle....knock knock grabs the swings it widly open ...."Hi Ive been waiting for you" he beams
    the woman has been back several times selling religion/cheap solar/ vacuum cleaners etc
    I would love to grow my own food, but I can not find bacon seeds

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Melbourne
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    0

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Tonto View Post
    Mate of mine cured them for all time well the man he did anyway.

    He's into weight lifting, one saturday wife and kids gone shopping and he spies 2 mormans coming up drive, thinks very quickly, strips to the buff, one hand on the door handle....knock knock grabs the swings it widly open ...."Hi Ive been waiting for you" he beams
    the woman has been back several times selling religion/cheap solar/ vacuum cleaners etc
    I don't have the luxury of being buff however all I do is blaspheme. Seems to work every time.
    -Scott

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Sydney
    Age
    54
    Posts
    891

    Default

    There is nothing to discuss when they do not exist.
    Visit my website at www.myFineWoodWork.com

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Hell with fluro lighting
    Age
    55
    Posts
    624

    Default

    My mum turned the hose on the Mormons by accident last time they came around. She was watering the garden and not taking notice, they coughed and she turned to see what made the noise. Problem was the hose followed her eyes and promptly hosed the Mormons.

    Her father used to invite them in then ague with them until they were confused about their own religion. I come from good atheist stock
    I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

    My Other Toys

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Sunshine Coast Queensland
    Age
    54
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    0

    Default

    A friend of mine would call them to the side gate and explain that the carpets had just been cleaned and were wet but they were welcome to come out the back to sit and chat - for some reason they always declined.
    Not sure why, it's not as if the 3 great danes were unfriendly, in fact they were very friendly - and also stood about 6'3 when they jumped up and rested their paws on your shoulders.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Not far enough away from Melbourne
    Posts
    1,384

    Default

    I just tell them:

    "I'm sorry but I do not have time to get into a childish argument over who has the best imaginary friend."

    That usually finishes it before it even gets started.

    Doug
    I got sick of sitting around doing nothing - so I took up meditation.

  10. #10
    rrich Guest

    Default

    I tell the Mormons that I would love to talk to them after they've read "Elmer Gantry" by Sinclair Lewis.

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