Why some men prefer dogs to women

[Woodwould]

1. The later you are, the more excited a dog is to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of smelly things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, 'If I died, would you get another dog?'

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a ute.

14. Dogs enjoy farts.

14. If you have a pee on the lemon tree late at night, a dog will gladly join you.

15. Dogs don't mind eating from dirty dishes.

16. If you can't flick a booger off the end of your finger, a dog will happily eat it off.

17. Dogs don't mind what you wear when you go out together.

18. Dogs enjoy keeping you company when you're on the toilet.

19. A dog will never tire of listening to your voice.

20. If a dog leaves, it won't take half your stuff.

[AUSSIE]

Woodwould yah got me ascratchen me hed now.
Tryen to work out why we get married at all
I thought I was getting some benifits from getting married ,like a cook,dishwasher,cleaner and a few other things.
I find I have to do them all and I have to put up with ,you havent put the washing out yet,you havent made the bed yet ,what will they say if they see that mess you left.
Yeh a dog is lookin good

[Batpig]

Dear Woodwould,

That is just one cracker of a line after another...

Some of them you even have to think about for a second or two , and they still turn out to be winners...

Many Thanks,
Batpig.

[rosewood]

You know, if you lock your dog and your wife in the boot of the car for a couple of hours, you don't need to be a rocket scientist to know which of the two will be happy to see you.