I was feeling a little lonely so I decided life would be more fun if I had a pet. So, I went to the pet shop and told the owner I wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, I finally bought a centipede which came in a little white box to use for his house. I took the box back home, found a good location for it and decided I would start off by taking my new pet to the pub to have a few drinks.

I asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go down to the Swinging Arms (there are lots of fights there) with me and have a beer?"

There was no answer. This bothered me a little but I waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to the pub for a beer?"

But again there was no answer from my new friend and pet. I waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. I decided to ask him one more time; this time putting my face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey in there! Would you like to go to the Swinging Arms and have a drink with me?"

A little voice came out of the box, "I heard you the first time! I'm putting my bloody shoes on."