Miss Beatrice

[Jim Carroll]

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been
married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One
afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint
sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.

As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a
cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in
the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea
the pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its
strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and He could no longer
resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about
this?" pointing to the bowl. "Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful?

I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little
package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep
it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I
haven't had the flu all winter."

[DJ’s Timber]