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Thread: Bear Remover

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Left of the middle
    Age
    63
    Posts
    232

    Default Bear Remover

    No doubt this has been here before, but for those who haven't seen it.






    A man wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there's an ad for 'Bear Removers.' He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over in 30 minutes.


    The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

    'What are you going to do,' the homeowner asks?

    'I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van.'

    He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

    'What's the shotgun for?' asks the homeowner.

    'If the bear knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog.
    100% of all non-smokers die

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Barboursville, Virginia USA
    Age
    77
    Posts
    549

    Default

    An oldie but goodie.
    Cheers,

    Bob



  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    sale victoria
    Posts
    0

    Default

    nuts

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
    Age
    74
    Posts
    2,238

    Default

    We use a Jack Russell at our place for when they get in the Cypress trees (see avatar).
    Real bad during mating season.
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

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