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Thread: the aussie army

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    in my house
    Age
    58
    Posts
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    Default the aussie army



    For those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town west
    of
    Quilpie in the far south west of Queensland.

    Dear Mum & Dad,

    I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and
    Phil
    that the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to
    get
    in bloody quick smart before the jobs are all gone!

    I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don't
    hafta
    get outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all ya gotta
    do before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya
    uniform. No bloody cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to
    stack
    nothin'!! Ya haz gotta shave though, but its not so bad, coz
    there's lotsa hot water and even a light to see what ya doing!

    At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no kangaroo
    steaks or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed again
    until noon, and by that time all the city boys are buggered
    because
    we've been on a 'route march' - geez it's only just like walking
    to the windmill in the back paddock!!

    This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with laughter. I
    keep getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye is as big
    as a bloody possum's bum and it don't move and it's not firing back at
    ya like the Johnson's did when our big scrubber bull got into their
    prize cows before the Ekka last year!

    All ya gotta do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target

    it's a piece of !! You don't even load your own cartridges -
    they
    comes in little boxes and ya don't have to steady yourself
    against the rollbar of the roo shooting truck when you reload!

    Sometimes ya gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta be
    real careful coz they break easy - it's not like fighting with Doug
    and Phil and Jack and Boori and Steve and Muzza all at once like we
    do at home after the muster.

    Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like I'm the
    best the platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one bloke from
    the Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pick
    handles
    across the shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight
    stone wringin' wet, but I fought him till the other blokes carried me
    off to the boozer.

    I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick
    before word gets around how bloody good it is.

    Your loving daughter,

    Sheila

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    bc canada
    Posts
    1

    Default aus. army

    that was a bloody good one.

    rupertbri ,old sweat.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Sydney,Australia
    Posts
    42

    Default

    Been around for a while.................


    "A Letter to parents

    Written by Private Zebulon Hardin in 1917 while at US Army Training Camp,
    Camp Breckenridge, Kentucky


    Dear Ma and Pa:

    Am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Army beats
    working for Old Man Minch at the wood mill by a city mile. Tell them to join
    up quick before maybe all the places are filled.

    I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6
    o'clock., but am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all
    you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things -- no hogs
    to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically
    nothing. You got to shave, but it is not bad in warm water. Some of the city
    boys laughed when I was doing my morning prayers --
    but I just remembered Jesus said to turn the other cheek so I did.

    My night time praying was so good some of them decided to join in too. Now
    it has been some weeks and we have a regular bunch of us and I lead them in
    some good words. We got two boys from New York and they are Jewish boys and
    on Friday nights they put this little hat on their head and tell us all
    stories from the Old Testament, so it is like a history lesson too. Their
    praying is in Bible Language, Hebrew, and it is right interesting to hear
    it. Oh, tell Parson that their Bibles dont have the Words of Jesus in it, it
    is just the Old Testament and it reads backwards, that is from the back to
    the front. One of the boys, Private Marvin Fineberg, says that they went to
    special school after regular school to learn to read Hebrew and that it goes
    backwards from english. Whee ... looks like hen scratching to me, but they
    ain't bad folks after all. They are Right With the Lord that's for sure.

    Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon,etc.,
    but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, beef, ham steak, pie and regular food
    like momma's fried okra. But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit between
    two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till
    noon, when you get fed again. Then we get fed again at night time. Almost
    like they are fattening us up. And those boys at our table in the "mess
    hall" are like a family now, we take turns saying Grace and everything which
    I think most of them didn't do before the US Army and our table. But I told
    them that I could not break the bread before giving Thanks, so they did it
    with me.

    It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "root marches,"
    which, the Sgt. says, are long walks to harden us up. If he thinks so, it is
    not my place to tell him different. A "root march" is about as far as to our
    mailbox at home down to school. Then the city guys all get sore feet and we
    ride back in those automobile waggons. The country is nice, but awful flat I
    didn't know Kenn. had any flat places. The Sgt. is like a schoolteacher. He
    nags some. The Capt. is like the school master. Cols. and Gens. just ride
    around and frown. They don't bother you none. They give speeches about "the
    kaiser's and the huns" and that we got to help out the english and the
    french. I expect that the germans are going to awful upset when we get
    there. We got two boys here from germantown up near nashville that their
    granddaddy came over from that part of the world (germany) and they are
    fixing to have at them and teach them old cousins of theirs a lesson. I
    imagine that the french folks will be eternally grateful as will those
    english even if we told them where to get off back in 1776.

    This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting Silver
    Dollars and won a medal for shooting. I don't know why. Ever time I shoot
    this one day shooting exercise they give me a brand new Silver Dollar. The
    bull's-eye is near as big as a squirrel and don't move. And it ain't
    shooting at you, like those Martin boys at home. All you got to do is lie
    there all comfortable and hit it, you don't even load your own cartridges.
    They come in boxes. The rifle they give us is one made in Springfield, up in
    Illinois, where that Smith gal moved to when she married the yankee boy last
    year. Now look at this! It shoots five times without reloading using a bolt
    action!

    I sure had some funning with a couple of yankee boys from Kansas. They were
    kind of making fun of me when I told them about living here in Tennessee and
    how the hills were all full of my cousins and so forth and so on. Anyway,
    they asks me what I learned in school. Well, Miss Jenkins at the school
    house would have been right happy. I told them that I would bet them one of
    my Silver Dollars that they can't tell me the words to the Declaration of
    Independence. One of the other boys got the dictionary from the barracks and
    we set to reciting. Well, After I won that Silver Dollar, they asks "how
    about the Star Spangle Banner -- do you know it?" I told them One Silver
    Dollar for each part of it. They didn't know what I was talking about, "each
    part" so I went ahead and sang all of the Four Verses. Well, then it came to
    the Bible. I am going to ask Parson to forgive me for this because I was
    greedy for those Silver Dollars. They asked verses from the Old and the New
    Books and who did what when and where and so forth and so on. After I got
    all the Silver Dollars the boys had, well, they just gathered around and
    slapped my back. That fellow Fineberg and his friend laughed and laughed
    and said that if I were one of their people I could win a prize at thier
    Ya-shiver School too.

    Well, I got to close, it is getting time when they turn out the lights here
    in the barrack -- did I tell you that they have the Electricity Lamps here?
    Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join this US Army before other
    fellows get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

    Your loving son,

    Zeb

    P.S. Speaking of shooting, enclosed is a post office order of $200 for the
    barn roof and ma's teeth. The city boys play with dice, but not very good at
    all."

    -----------------------------------------

    Historian's Note: Corporal Zebulon Hardin was killed at the Battle of the
    Somme while leading his squad on a mission to capture a German machine gun
    nest.

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