Script with blatant innuendo

[simon c]

If there are any poms out there you'll get a special thrill from this but it's pretty good anyway:

For those of you who don't have kids or are far too young to remember
the splendid children's TV programme "Rainbow", this may be a little
lost on you...... but it must have been a great episode to watch!
Almost too ridiculous to believe... These are taken from original
Rainbow scripts and there's no way these could have been done by
accident. Supposedly the writer and driector got sacked but it had already gone to air. PS Zippy and George are hand puppets and Bungle is a man in a bear suit.

Now before you say "hoax", for those of you with fast connections here's a link to the video http://www.keenaschips.co.uk/index.p...s/misc_rainbow

Enjoy,

Simon

The sketch opens with Zippy peeling a banana...
Zippy: " One skin, two skin, three skin, four "
George: " Zippy, where is Bungle?"
Zippy: " I think Geoffrey is trying to get him up"
We see a view of the door and hear Bungle moaning from Behind it.
Bungle: " Geoffrey, I can't get it in"
Geoffrey: "You managed it last night"
Bungle: "I know, let's try it round the other way. Ooooooh, I've got it
in"
Bungle and Geoffrey enter the studio with Bungle carrying a hammer
and peg kit
Bungle: " Would you stick this on the shelf, George"
George: " I can't reach, you'll have to stick it up yourself,
Geoffrey (to camera) " Hello everyone, today we are talking about
playing"
Bungle: " Playing with each other, Geoffrey?"
Geoffrey:" Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend that you like to
play with?"
George:" Yesterday we played with each other's balls.
Are we going to play with our friend's balls today?
Bungle: " Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well."
Geoffrey (to camera) Have you seen Bungles twanger?
Zippy:" Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it."
Bungle: " It's my plucking instrument."
Geoffrey asks the audience if they can pluck like Bungle
Zippy:" I can, I'm the best plucker here."
George;" And I'm good at banging. My peg's hard isn't it Zippy?
Zippy:" Well of course it is, Your peg wouldn't go in if it was soft."
Geoffrey;" Let's get back to Bungle's twanger."
Bungle (excited) " Oooooh Geoffrey, we could all play with our twangers
couldn't we? Let's play the plucking song. Rod and Roger can get their
instruments out and Jane has got two lovely Maracas."
Singers Rod, Freddy and Jane enter.
Freddy:" We could hear you all banging away"
Rod: "Banging can be fun."
Jane:" Ooooh yes, and I was banging away all last night with Rod and
Freddy."
Freddy (looking sad) " Yes, but it broke my plucking instrument."
Rod (to Jane) " Do you want to blow on my pipe while I'm twanging away?"
Jane: " Oh no, I was banging away with Freddy last night. But would you
Like to play with my maracas?
Zippy; " No, let's just pluck away with our twangers."
George:"Yes, it doesn't matter what size our twanger is."
Zippy;" I've got a big red one."
George: " I've only got a tiny twanger. But it works well and I like to
play with it."
Geoffrey (to viewers) " Well, have you got your twangers out? And
remember, you can bang your balls at the same time. If you haven't got
any, ask a friend if you can play with his. Now, let's all play the
plucking song."
Everyone in studio: " Pluck, pluck, pluck along, we're going to pluck
all day."

[Iain]

I also remember that classic Captain Pugwash with Master Bates and Seaman Staines.
They got away with that for years while all the lefties were crucifying Noddy and Big Ears with their nasty little pooft, sorry, homosexual ways.