My application form for boofhead of the week

[Shannon]

Good afternoon all,

Week before last, I needed to kneecap a couple of dead gum trees and a liquid amber out the front before they became too much of a problem.

No worries, break out the trusty chainsaw to attack said trees. Hadn't been used since last year when I lent it out to a friend, so thought I'd give it the once over to make sure everything was OK before firing it up. New fuel, chain oil, checked nothing was caught in the blade, oil up chain etc.
Checked the chain to see how the bearings were doing. Bit hard to turn.

Oh well just a bit stiff from inactivity. Fire it up after a couple of pulls, give it a bit of a rev, but still no chain spinning???

Alright, shut her down and disassemble to check why chain isn't going in its preferred spinning motion.
Chain not too tight, no obstructions etc, take blade off and discover that it is the chainwheel (for want of a better word, the spocket that the motor runs to make the chainsaw spin) is seized. Not happy jan, how could something like that happen as it doesn't get that much use, maybe something is caught?

OK then, what was going to be an hour or two of sawing while my daughter had her arvo sleep, is now rapidly becoming a bit more complicated.

Take surclip etc off to get to the chainwheel so that I can get it off and see what I can see. Geez what a hard slog! Took a lot of effort because there was an alloy stip jambed up against the side of it - that must be part of the problem.

Can the real chainsaw operators see where this is going yet - I wish I could have!!!

OK get the sucker off - only to find that there are cylindrical bearings on the shaft, bearings that do not like being yanked by force! 6 out of 14 bearings fly in all sorts of directions and take many minutes to locate.... thank goodness I had just cleaned the workshop

Motor seems to be spinning quite freely, so in fact it is not seized, so what the heck is the problem?!?
Try a dry run of putting spocket back on, and it is going to be ni on impossible with that damn alloy strip in the way, doesn't look round like I thought it should either, I wonder why???

OK, bite the bullet and try to put the bearings back in. Get to the last 2 three times after carefull placement, and then the top ones would fall out....DOH!!! Try using a small screwdriver to put the last two in (after about 15mins of careful placement)
Discover that the bearings are slightly magnetic :eek: all bearings stick to said screwdriver and are very close to being flung across the room, but I found my composure just in time.

Decide that after 2 and a bit hours of torture, I can swallow my plide and take it to the pros - after all, it must have come back to me this way, and I had given it a good shot. Must be something quite complex.
Gather up all bits, spend another 20 mins looking for another rogue bearing that slipped to the floor. Tape it all up and head to the shop the next day.

Go in feeling like a bit of a gumby (not our one, the colloquial one for clutz), and telling him so. I quickly explain the painful situation, and my attempts to fix the problem.

Said mechanic, looks at me for a moment, releases the kickback switch that had been activated at some point which locks the blade up in emergencies, and hands me back my chainsaw with a wry smile.Yes that alloy strip was the kickback braking system

Do I get the prize??

I'm still crying into my pillow at night, and even though the mechanic has always been great and reasonable in price, I am unsure if he will be getting my business again - I just don't think my small bit of pride can take walking back into the shop
Cheerio

[Kev Y.]

Shannon, Shannon, Shannon.. I guessed the problem from paragraph 3!

BTDT

[zenwood]

I know nothing about chainsaws but can relate to your experience after displaying my ignorance to the entire world (not just the local chainsaw mechanic) via these forums in the context of a recent bandsaw purchase. Do I share it here? What the heck, since we're in self-mocking mode, here it is:

http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com...5&postcount=60

(and surrounding thread).

[echnidna]

I thought I did stupid things but now I have a new goal!!!

[Tankstand]

One of the reasons why I went for an electric chainsaw!

When the guard is tripped, The motor, she no go!

[Daddles]

We really do need a Gumby Of The Week award don't we, except we've already got a member of this community named Gumby.

Thanks Shannon. Makes my life easier to know that somewhere out there, someone else is making their week at least as hard as mine is

and the nice thing is ...

it's always voluntary and self inflicted

How we ever evolved to this point is a matter which the animal kingdom discusses regularly. The prevailing view is that the majority of us are too dumb even for Darwin's theories :eek:

Richard

[zenwood]

How we ever evolved to this point is a matter which the animal kingdom discusses regularly.

The mice and the dolphins are the only ones who've sorted it out.

[Christopha]

Bought daughter darling dearest a new power drill at the Adelaide woodshow( she wanted one!)..... she rang me up to complain that she had terrible trouble getting it to actually drill..... in my ignorance as a mere father I had bought her a drill which had forward and reverse!![B]

[Auld Bassoon]

Bought daughter darling dearest a new power drill at the Adelaide woodshow( she wanted one!)..... she rang me up to complain that she had terrible trouble getting it to actually drill..... in my ignorance as a mere father I had bought her a drill which had forward and reverse!![B]

So, you forgot to buy her a multi-directional set of drill bits? How careless

[dazzler]

This kind of reminds me of when I was an apprentice and started chasing girls. Brain just wasnt on the job. Pulled the head off a caterpillar grader, cleaned it up and lost it for three days....looked everywhere and finally found it in the lunch room!

DOH

[adrian]

Shannon,
All I could do was think back and nod sagely.
Have you ever walked around the house with your car keys in your hand, trying to find your car keys?

[shep]

dazzler my very first day as an apprentice i maniged to squash a tool shed with an aticulated crain. now i know abought hydrolic creep. the funny part was the forman's only comment was "i hope you learn from your mistake"

shep

[kekemo]

Living in the country luckly sometimes you have access to wood for winter fires, we did. We used a big McCulloch(something like that)for our needs, after the first time that my husband did the same thing, yes cleaned it up, ready to take it back to the dealer, being so far out of town we had the time to read over the instruction & problem page....before our next trip in. It was one of the best features, as we had 3 growing lads and quite often others around who thought they were capable...if you hit that break each time you put the saw down no one could use it unless they knew the workings of a chainsaw. We found it a great advantage!
Hey, its just like women who write a shopping lists, & 90% of the time where do we leave it....at home, and you think we'd learn!
Great that you shared with us, you have a gift in making a lot of us feel bright for about two seconds until we remember our stupid moments....
Enjoy the woodworking...

[adrian]

Hey, its just like women who write a shopping lists, & 90% of the time where do we leave it....at home, and you think we'd learn!
.

Not just women!!
What makes it worse is when you come back with everything you didn't originally want and not one item that you went there for in the first place.

[Pat]

I am a BOOFHEAD! I went to price some Kutzall bits at the local Mitre 10 and while I was there I just happened to notice the 900mm Quick grips were reasonable cheap ($26.95). So there I am thinking, mmm I have some spare pancakes in my account, I'll grab the two of them and a couple of other bits and pieces and put it on my card and MBGitW will not know. Get to the till and the clamps ring up $21.90, so with glee at my good fortune I pull out the wrong card and put it on that, again! I must check which card I am handing over !