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Thread: Messy divorce

  1. #1
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    Default Messy divorce

    A couple decided to divorce after the wife was found to be unfaithful to
    her husband. She had now moved out to be with the new boyfriend.
    The husband packed his belongings then sat at the dining room table, and feasted
    out on a jar of shrimps.
    When finished he went into every room and pushed some half-eaten shrimps
    into the hollow centre of every available curtain rod.
    After moving out his wife came back with the new boyfriend and they took
    possession of the home. All was well for about a week when they noticed
    a smell.
    Vents were checked, carpets were cleaned, air fresheners were hung
    everywhere but nothing overcame the rotten smell.
    Finally they decided to sell the house and move out, but even though they
    reduced the price of the place they could not find a buyer. In desperation
    they borrowed heavily and purchased another home.
    She rang her now ex husband to mention the problem and that the house
    was now not worth much. In turn he offered to buy the house at a heavily
    reduced price and a very quick settlement was agreed to.

    A week later the papers were completed, monies paid and the woman had
    the furniture carrier come in and take away all of the contents.

    And, to spite her ex husband, she even took the curtain rods!!!

    Don't you just love stories with "happy endings".

    Allan
    Life is short ... smile while you still have teeth.

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Murray Bridge SA
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    Default

    LOVE IT, sounds like my ex sister inlaw, she even took up the carpet.

  3. #3
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    Default

    Not a joke its true.



    Back when a first year apprentice mechanic a disgruntled Ford Escort owner who had put his vehicle in to have warranty work done while he went OS for 12 weeks had stuffed prawns into the hub cap of the car. The car was brought in two days prior Christmas, we had 7 days off and back in the New Year. Stored on the 5th floor in the shade but still quite warm and odour had crept throughout, bins checked and scrubbed, lockers also slowly vehicles came and went and as the days past the smell got worse as temp's increased. Cars were checked inside, over, under, still no true indicator where it was coming from. The floor was cleared of ALL vehicles an staff fumigated washed down windows opened for days. Finally the odour had gone the offending vehicle was out on the lot out side. Brought back in days later in an hour the smell was back. It became a coin toss to who was to remove the offending hub cap yep me I was prep'd to the hilt gas mask, covered with plastic, gloves and team standing by with shovels and hoses not to mention bottles of disinfectant. Popped the cap and bolted dry reaching as I went hoses et etc and that was just to clean up from those being sick. Two prawns caused the whole thing in one hub cap. The customer's vehicle was kept for 6 months till he paid the clean up bill at which time we did the warranty work.

  4. #4
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  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pac man View Post

    My apologies to Cliff Rogers, did not know he submitted the more complete version
    of this in April 2007.

    I received an eMail a couple of days ago from another source and thought it was
    worth submitting.

    Allan
    Life is short ... smile while you still have teeth.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Allan at Wallan View Post
    My apologies to Cliff Rogers, did not know he submitted the more complete version
    of this in April 2007.

    I received an eMail a couple of days ago from another source and thought it was
    worth submitting.

    Allan
    What the !!!!!!. Does somebody remember April 2007, is that possible
    Cheers Fred



    The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with the light on.
    http://www.redbubble.com/people/fredsmi ... t_creative"

    Updated 26 April 2010
    http://sites.google.com/site/pomfred/

  7. #7
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    Maybe it's his second ex?

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by fenderbelly View Post
    What the !!!!!!. Does somebody remember April 2007, is that possible
    Just checked ... I joined the forum in May 2007. No wonder I did not remember it.

    I claim to have a photographic memory, but sometimes I run out of film.

    Allan
    Life is short ... smile while you still have teeth.

  9. #9
    Mobyturns's Avatar
    Mobyturns is offline In An Instant Your Life Can Change Forever
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    Quote Originally Posted by Allan at Wallan View Post
    Just checked ... I joined the forum in May 2007. No wonder I did not remember it.

    I claim to have a photographic memory, but sometimes I run out of film.

    Allan
    My memory is digital, lots of 1's, lots of 0's but increasingly more blanks between them

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mobyturns View Post
    My memory is digital, lots of 1's, lots of 0's but increasingly more blanks between them
    Maybe you need a defrag?

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by wheelinround View Post
    Not a joke its true.



    Back when a first year apprentice mechanic a disgruntled Ford Escort owner who had put his vehicle in to have warranty work done while he went OS for 12 weeks had stuffed prawns into the hub cap of the car. The car was brought in two days prior Christmas, we had 7 days off and back in the New Year. Stored on the 5th floor in the shade but still quite warm and odour had crept throughout, bins checked and scrubbed, lockers also slowly vehicles came and went and as the days past the smell got worse as temp's increased. Cars were checked inside, over, under, still no true indicator where it was coming from. The floor was cleared of ALL vehicles an staff fumigated washed down windows opened for days. Finally the odour had gone the offending vehicle was out on the lot out side. Brought back in days later in an hour the smell was back. It became a coin toss to who was to remove the offending hub cap yep me I was prep'd to the hilt gas mask, covered with plastic, gloves and team standing by with shovels and hoses not to mention bottles of disinfectant. Popped the cap and bolted dry reaching as I went hoses et etc and that was just to clean up from those being sick. Two prawns caused the whole thing in one hub cap. The customer's vehicle was kept for 6 months till he paid the clean up bill at which time we did the warranty work.
    Had a mate do something similar when he was an apprentice but he carefully put them in the rocker cover of a particularly annoying customer.
    regards
    Nick
    veni, vidi,
    tornavi
    Without wood it's just ...

  12. #12
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    A local lad in our neighborhood decided he would make inroads with the local young ladies. His advances where not appreciated. When he had a new sound system fitted to his convertible, someone tucked in a packet of prawn heads on top of the new radio. To overcome the stench, he would leave the car parked in front of the house with the top down. A concrete truck driver (the brother of one of the girls) filled the car with wet concrete one night, right up to the window sills. It fixed the smell.

  13. #13
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    Along similar lines to the prawn heads, years ago a guy at work had an XD Falcon sedan as the family car, and an older Corolla for going to work and general running around in. His missus did a really big shopping expedition coming up to Australia Day, and enlisted the kids to unload the groceries. All but one frozen chook made it into the kitchen, and with all the goings on with kids unloading the boot and restocking freezers, fridge and pantry, the chook wasn't missed.
    Well, the Falcon remained in the driveway for quite a few days, with the kids busy in the pool, and the Corolla used for any quick local trips.

    It appears that the missing chook tried to escape the incredibly hot boot a bit like a Genie out of a bottle, but was discovered by all and sundry who happened to be down-wind at the time. The blast of hot air when the boot was eventually opened to investigate the stench was very nearly overwhelming, and remembering at this stage the possible cause was unknown. After a few minutes of airing, a plastic bag containing a slimy mess of chook carcass was found in the gap between the back seat and the hump in the boot floor where the diff traversed the car.

    The removal of the plastic bag was not a pleasant experience, and the boot was hosed out for a long time and left for about a week to dry out and air. The smell eventually disappeared with the help of all sorts of deodorizers.

    Interestingly, the same bloke's wife managed to up-end a 4 litre can of white water based paint in the same boot on the way home from Mitre 10 (out with the hose again), and they also discovered a 1 litre bottle of milk wedged under the passenger seat several days after another shopping expedition, again in summer. The bottle had swollen incredibly, but had not burst, but it sort of 'went off' when the lid was released, fortunately in the front yard, not the kitchen.

    I often think of the chook episode when I see one of the older model Falcons.

    Alan...

  14. #14
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    I used to knock around with a mate whose dad owned a towing business in Melbourne.

    He used to get the council tow away work and break down as well as accident work. We had one vehicle in there with was impounded for some reason and after about a week started smelling really badly.

    We did a bit of investimigation to try and find out why it was in the year and whether it was impounded by the police who they also did work for.

    After about 3 weeks the yardman (Harry) finally popped the boot to find that the owner had just done their meat shopping before the car had broken down somewhere. the smell was worse but got better after a week and the vehicle eventually went to auction to cover the storage fees they had accumulated.

    I never ceased to amaze me though, at the numbers and types of vehicles that were abandoned and sold through this method.

  15. #15
    rrich Guest

    Default

    I had one of the new F-250 Ford trucks. With two other co-workers we would car pool. (Only to get HOV lane access.)

    At lunch sometimes one of the co-workers would borrow the truck to go get lunch. One day he spilled a full cup of Pepsi over the floor on the passenger side. He offered to have the carpets cleaned, but I didn't think it was necessary. After we had gone our separate ways and I retired, about 6 months. I noticed that the passenger side of the truck had a lot of ants. It was then that I realized that the co-worker would drink regular Pepsi (with sugar). While I would normally drink sugar free soda.

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