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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 1999
    Location
    Tooradin,Victoria,Australia
    Age
    75
    Posts
    2,515
    Post Thanks / Like

    Talking Makes you wonder.

    Things That Make You Go Hmmmm...

    Here are some actual label instructions from various international consumer products:
     On a blanket from Taiwan: NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO. (Bugger, what am I gonna use now???)
     On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.
     On a Taiwanese shampoo: USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
     On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink: AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
     On a New Zealand insect spray: THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
     In an American guide to setting up a new computer: TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
     On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins: WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?
     On an American Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
     On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips: YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE. (The shoplifter's special!)
     On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. (Too late! You lose!)
     On a Korean kitchen knife: WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. (Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
     On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. (As opposed to use in outer space?)

     On a Japanese food processor: NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE. (Now I'm curious!)
     On British Sainsbury's peanuts: WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS. (Really?)
     On an American Airlines packet of nuts: INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS. (I'm glad they cleared that up.)
     On a Swedish chainsaw: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS. (What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)
     On a Canadian child's Superman costume: WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY. (That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
     On some British frozen dinners: SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST
     On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: FITS ONE HEAD. (sorry for those who have two heads)
     On packaging for a Rowenta iron: DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.
     On a British Boot's "Children's" Cough Medicine: DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.
     On a British Nytol Sleep Aid Tablets label: WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS. (Duh!)
     On British Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING



    ------------------
    Ian () Robertson
    "We do good turns every day"

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
    Age
    75
    Posts
    2,238
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    Post

    Geez , where do you find this stuff. Thank god we don't have tornadoes and we do have knife resistant children.
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 1999
    Location
    Grovedale, Victoria Australia
    Age
    67
    Posts
    2
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    Wink

    This Makes Blondes Look pretty smart.
    Jim Carroll
    One Good Turn Deserves Another. CWS, Vicmarc, Robert Sorby, Woodcut, Tormek, Woodfast
    Are you a registered member? Why not? click here to register. It's free and only takes 37 seconds!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 1999
    Location
    Grovedale, Victoria Australia
    Age
    67
    Posts
    2
    Post Thanks / Like

    Smile

    SHE was watching!
    Jim Carroll
    One Good Turn Deserves Another. CWS, Vicmarc, Robert Sorby, Woodcut, Tormek, Woodfast
    Are you a registered member? Why not? click here to register. It's free and only takes 37 seconds!

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