One afternoon, Bill Clinton was sitting in his office when his telephone
rang. "Hello Mr. Clinton," a heavily accented voice says". This is Paddy
down in County Cavan, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that I am officially declaring war on you!"
"Well, Paddy," Bill replies, "This indeed is important news! Tell me, how
big is your army?"
"At this moment in time," says Paddy after a moments calculation,
"There is myself, my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Gerry and the
entire dominoes team from the pub. That makes 8!"
Bill sighs and says, "I must tell you Paddy that I have 1 million men in my
army waiting to move on my word" "OK," says Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"
Sure enough, the next day Paddy calls back. "Right Mr. Clinton, the war
is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"
"What equipment would that be, Paddy?" Bill asks.
"Well, we have 2 combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Murphy's tractor from
the farm" Once more Bill sighs and says, "I must tell you Paddy that I have 50,000 tanks, 2000 mine layers, 10,000 armoured cars and my army has ncreased to 1 and a half million since we last spoke"
"I'll be dogged!" says Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"
Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. "Right Mr. Clinton, the war is
still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've gotten out old Ted's cropsrayer with a couple of rifles in the cockpit and the soccer team has joined us as well!"
Once more Bill sighs and says "I must tell you Paddy that I have 4000 bombers and 8000 high maneuverability attack planes and my military installations are
surrounded by laser guided surface to air missiles and since we last spoke, my army has increased to 2 million."
"Oh cripes," says Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back"
Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. "Right Mr. Clinton, I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war"
"I'm very sorry to hear that," says Bill. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well," says Paddy, "We've all had a chat and t'be sure, there's no way we
can cope with 2 million prisoners."