The nurse

[Grumpy John]

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen
mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and
gives him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only
here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my
testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate
from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment
and pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles
gently in the other.

She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them,
Sir. They look fine."

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says
very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen
very, very closely:

Are - my - test - results - back?"

[Handyjack]

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen
mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and ...

says "I am here to put a catheter in. I have never done this to a male patient. Do you mind if you are the first."

The male patient is in no position to reply.

[Sturdee]

A young student nurse appears and ... says "I am here to put a catheter in.

Or in my case, lying in bed in the hospital, my nurse comes and says we can remove your catheter today, do you mind if my student nurse (on work experience) does it.

So the catheter was removed by the student nurse, under instructions of my nurse with an older nurse watching as she was getting re qualified.

Never had three young females pay so much attention to that part of my body, never will again either.

Peter.

[Handyjack]

Or in my case, lying in bed in the hospital, my nurse comes and says we can remove your catheter today, do you mind if my student nurse (on work experience) does it.

So the catheter was removed by the student nurse, under instructions of my nurse with an older nurse watching as she was getting re qualified.

Never had three young females pay so much attention to that part of my body, never will again either.

Peter.

I know the feeling from my own experience.