The Code of Practice

[Driver]

Here's the latest update. It includes additions suggested by

DanP - New content on Inter-Bloke Communications, Sharpening, and some supplementary advice on Standing and/or Leaning and Staring.

Zed - New - Acknowledgement of the (anonymous) authorship of Appendices.

Ashore - Blokely Attire and new stuff on Stubby Holders.

Waldo, JDub and silentC - The Shed.

Thanks, gentlemen for your sterling work.

Toodle Pip!

Col

[RETIRED]

Now we know why the constitution took so long to write? C'est bien mon ami.

[Waldo]

G'day Driver,

I'd like to put forward a motion that the latest variation and ammendment of the Code of Practice be accepted and passed. Any one willing to second?

And three blokey cheers to Driver for his outstanding effort.

[Driver]

Now we know why the constitution took so long to write? C'est bien mon ami.

I knew when I started this thread that there was likely to be a bit of work in it. Actually, I'm surprised at how far we've taken it in a relatively short time. The thread's first post was only a week ago.

What hasn't surprised me is the enthusiastic way it has been embraced by everyone who has contributed and the genuinely creative thinking that has gone into the contributions.

(Je te remercis, mon vieux métis et hache-manieur!)

Col

[Pat]

I second your motion Waldo. Many thanks to Col for this opus.

[Skew ChiDAMN!!]

I wonder if the PTBs will consider including it in the Best of the Best?

A short while ago I posted something to the "Shedette" thread and then realised it raises a valid point... hence a slight revision for appraisal here:

If two sheds (shedettes' inclusive) are in close proximity no tools, fittings, parts of collections or any item that can be moved without use of an engine-hoist/forklift shall be moved from one abode to the other without previously obtained permission, preferably in writing. Blood- or tear-stained documents do not count as permission, nor does "In your dreams" or any verbal agreement made during a session involving blokes' drinks.

[RETIRED]

I wonder if the PTBs will consider including it in the Best of the Best?

A short while ago I posted something to the "Shedette" thread and then realised it raises a valid point... hence a slight revision for appraisal here:

If two sheds (shedettes' inclusive) are in close proximity no tools, fittings, parts of collections or any item that can be moved without use of an engine-hoist/forklift shall be moved from one abode to the other without previously obtained permission, preferably in writing. Blood- or tear-stained documents do not count as permission, nor does "In your dreams" or any verbal agreement made during a session involving blokes' drinks.

or other male/female arrangements. IE. agree or the answer is no.

[Skew ChiDAMN!!]

And more on the subject of sharpening, which leads on to... well...

When a bloke finally deigns to sharpen his tools, he will do so in a truly blokely manner. It doesn't matter whether he's simply reshaping a $2 cold-chisel or honing a $mega handplane blade, every tool sharpened will be able to circumcise a gnat or split atoms with a simple flourish. The final shape of the sharpened edge is irrelevant, the tool may be rendered totally useless for it's original use, whereupon it may become a part of a collection or find an alternative use. All that matters is that it's sharp.

It is mandatory to prove this by testing it upon the hairs of the fore-arm, followed by hairs of the leg should more tools be sharpened than the arms can readily accomodate. Scarification is not necessary, although there are those who deem that no tool is truly sharp until it has been blooded.

NB: It is not considered blokely to shave anywhere below the neck except when sharpening tools. Similarly, waxing is definite chap behaviour except when caused inadvertently by removing dried glue, lacquer, paint or similar that wasn't noticed when it was leaned in, spilled or otherwise splashed.

NB#2 An important exception to the last exception is the "bikini line" as no bloke dressed in suitably blokely attire would ever be in this situation. Or admit to it, anyway. Which is, to a bloke, the same thing. Consequently this would be a good method to determine whether a visitor is a bloke or a chap, were it not for the fact that only a chap would attempt to apply it.

[Cliff Rogers]

Struth Skew... take a breath... I'm going purple in the face reading this stuff.

[Skew ChiDAMN!!]

And that's the condensed version.

[BobL]

I just saw this a few minutes ago. My eyes are still watering from laughing so much. Have circulated to a few "blokes" who will seriously identify.
Thanks

[Zed]

I second the motion to accept.

[Ashore]

Then all those in favor ( with Col's Ok of course )

[RufflyRustic]

Aye!!!!

[doug the slug]

looks good to me