Warning about depression - please read

[aiwoz]

Sympathy and condolences to all of you who have suffered or are suffering due to those thus afflicted.

My lovely second wife unfortunately lost her brother as he suicided quite some years back and i never got to know him. Her mother has attempted 3 times and my wife has been left to get her back on track each time and is now living with us until she can get back out on her own.

Anniversaries and birthdays that can never be are usually the hardest times and with the recent resignation of Gallop over here, hopefully others can take heart and seek help.

Someone will always be there.

Aiwoz

[adrian]

My first experience with suicide was when I was in primary school. One of my friends brothers hanged himself on the clothes line. He was only about 12.
The next was a guy I worked with in the 90's.
The last was my uncle who hanged himself in his garage last year. He was in his late seventies. His wife had died and his two kids didn't have much to do with him and it was his solution to lonliness.
I guess most of us have contemplated it from time to time but we just don't get desperate enough to do it.
I've suffered chronic pain from IBS-C for over 30 years so I can understand why people sometimes take the suicide option. A few years ago I had a month of almost constant, incredible pain. I spent a lot of my time curled up in a ball abusing the gods and hoping I would get struck by lightning. I don't know what the neighbours thought about it. I was trying to be as quiet as possible. I was lucky that I had a friend who came around almost every day to support me. I am very aware that if I had still owned a rifle I wouldn't be here now.
IBS and many other forms of chronic pain are very often suffered in silence. You have to be more sensitive to peoples needs and take their illness into account when organising activities. I have known of people who suffer from IBS-C to research toilet locations when planning something as simple as shopping. If they can't get accurate information about locations and travelling time to each toilet they don't go out. There are many people who hear about that sort of thing and can't help but think it's funny. Believe me, it's not. It's a common cause of depression in the 10% of the First World population who suffer from it.
A friend of mine has had two hip replacements because of arthritis. He has it in his spine and both shoulders so when we organise activities we are very cognisant of what he can and can't do.

The same goes for a friend suffering depression. You have to be aware of what is going on in their head. Always engage them in conversation when you are out and about because a crowded room is the lonliest place on the planet when you're depressed.
If someone in your house is depressed turn off the news broadcasts and use the newspaper to line the garbage because garbage is all you get on the news these days.

[Ivan in Oz]

One of the reasons people don't get help is that they've read the scary stuff, particularly anecdotes about meds and IF YOU ARE DEPRESSED, that is EXACTLY the sort of stuff you lap up.
Cheers
Richard

G'day Guys....and Gals.
I'm thinking I'm there at the moment.
Severe....Dunno?????
Or am I just Lethargic?
As Wongo puts it "You can talk the game but can you play the game."
That is me ATM. Have the Tools and nothing else

Looking for ways to get through it ...AND Come out thge other end, unscathed as much as possible.

One of Bennylairds Posts just hit the Nail on the head, and gave me the iniative to write; Maybe he's there also; for his sake, I hope NOT!!
http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com...ad.php?t=38661

Hope to be at Rockers next month,
I'll either be coping; to some degree; or Hopefully over it; to some degree


Hey!! Haven't lost my Sence of Humour

Lost most everything else of value to me, though.
What's that saying......Sorry Gals ......
Life's a Bitch, then she takes it ALL;
including the Kids:mad:

[Rocker]

Ivan,

Twenty-five years ago I was deeply depressed about problems at work. Now, I could scarcely be happier. If you can just keep going, you will find things will get better, and eventually you will emerge into the sunlight again. Hang in there mate.

Rocker

[jmk89]

Ivan

As someone who had to leave his job four years ago because of depression, and who still battles with it, let me add that you shouldn't let any concerns you may have with psychiatrists and cousellors mislead you. There are really talented counsellors who can help you with the process of reasoning and there are really good new drugs that can deal with the chemical side of depression. So GET HELP.
You aren't alone - one in five of us will have a depressive episode. And coming out the other side of depression is wonderful - I don't know about you, but when I was depressed all the things that used to give me pleasure did nothing for me, everything was a burden and the least irritation could lead me to losing my temper... Not pleasant for me or anyone around me. When you get over it, the most important thing is that you get back your sense of fun and pleasure. It's as if salt loses its flavour and then gets it back. So hang in and we are all on your side.

If you don't wnat to go straight to the counsellors and doctors, then get in touch with beyond blue or black dog foundation.

All the best, mate

Jeremy

[lubbing5cherubs]

Ivan mate I am sorry you are going through this at the time. I know my brother going through the same thing you are dealing and he is struggling too. It will get better. Mate seek help you do not have to do this alone. People around you still love you and to some you are valued. I went through this 12 months ago. The only reason I did not go through because there was no way I wanted my kids to know that mum was a quitter. So hang in there and get help. The meds make you feel weird at first but it passes quick
Toni

[namtrak]

Hang tough my friend. It will pan out - it always does.

[Andy Mac]

Hi Ivan,
sorry to hear things are not too bright for you at present. As the others say, hang in there, it'll pan out. You've just got to be there when the weather clears.
I've been through it a bit, but rejected the medicine. One of the things I remember being the worst is the lethargy, knowing you should be doing something, anything, but just can't muster the energy to face it. Just laying back and wallowing. Very hard to do, but get up and do something, take your mind off your problems. Then look back and realise you've done something, its a step.

Take care,

[Dean]

If you are the reading type, go to the bookshop or the library and get this book:

The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari - by Robin Sharma.

Best book I have ever read and helped bring me out of a depressive episode earlier this year. Highly recommended.
If you are not a reader, this book is the best reason to start.

[Honorary Bloke]

Ivan,

I feel your pain as I've been there myself. Thought I would never . . . but got through it. First, find a good counsellor, and then, if needed, the right meds. But a good counsellor can really help in a hurry. Don't put it off. There really is still sunlight out there, mate.

[Clinton1]

Ivan,

See someone about it, and get professional and capable assistance.

If all that you do is to find someone that you can have a massive whinge to, then do that. Hanging out with other people that are calm or upbeat is great.... being alone is not so good.

The trouble with depression is that its easy to keep going down .... it can lead you to places that you don't need to be, and that you might not need to get to if you seek a bit of help.
Depression and sadness are real, normal and reasonable emotions and we all have them. They are the result of brain chemistry affecting moods, but the trouble is that the moods can affect the brain chemistry in return.

The good thing is that when you come out the other side you will be a better person for it, and will be more resiliant to life's knocks.

There really is no substitute for seeking assistance.

[Terry B]

Ivan
As a GP I have seen many people with depression. (even thought this is not my primary interest)
There is good help avaliable throught friends, and the medical system.
Please go and see your GP for advice.

[E. maculata]

G'day Ivan,
like the good Doc stated, please talk to someone, it's the real blokey Blokes who get knocked by life and forget they're not islands.


Bruce C.

[woodsprite]

Yes it's 2.15 a.m. I just knocked off after 5 hours putting TWO coats of primer sealer on the plaster board in the last roomtobe painted - because SWMBO said it must have two coats even though the rest of the house didn't get two coats. Just did it to save an argument from starting.

Reading these posts is pretty sad - I feel for you guys who have had, or currently do have - depression. Right at the monent I am trying to spend every spare moment I can either working with wood (after many years absent from the pleasure of wood) or getting my tools up to speed again. I feel a desperate urgency to be 'doing something' all the time because this seems to be the only thing that keeps the black dog away from me. He bit me about a year ago and the doc said yeah, pretty serious depression, and he was right. Since then I have been trying so hard to keep on top of things but I feel I am losing the battle and that black dog is about to bite really hard.
If I can't get on top of it all soon through my woodie stuff I dunno what will become of me. I really do feel like I am slowly becoming invisible, you know, just disappearing. Let's hope the good wood gives me the boost I think it will.

Thanks for reading this - crazy isn't it - I don't know a single one of you, but I feel safe with you.
Jeff

[mic-d]

I typed most of a longish post last night and the bloody browser crashed didn't it . Anyway in abreviated form I can only add to what others have said Ivan, go and see a GP! If like me you need a wake-up call because you don't believe you have depression, go and do one or more of the questionaires on somewhere like beyond blue. That will give you a good indication if you have a problem if you answer honestly. About 6 years ago I went on meds for 6mnths but couldn't bear an annoying side-effect of that one (aropax), so got off it and went without until about 3mnths ago. Couldn't believe the black dog was back because nothing major seemed wrong, but the questionire said otherwise. So packed myself off to GP and am now on an excellent med for me (lexipro). She also suggested it was time to look at the triggers for my depression (fairly mild by some standards), so she suggested I visit an online CBT site run by ANU. www.moodgym.anu.edu.au/. Personaly I found it quite useful in identifying triggers and I'm hoping that I will have more tools in the future to deal with this drug free. I hope you all have a similar experience soon. Life really is too much joy to feel like ##### most of the time when there is help out there. The sooner you do it the less chance you will be kicking yourself that you wasted so much of your life.

Best wishes!
Michael