Latest Reputation revieved

[Zed]

Can you tell that to the monkey please

now now gumby, be nice or I'll tell your secret to everyone...

[keith53]

Or.....


(Best done in a gathering when responding to a ''how are you'' question)

Put on a suitably glum face and explain that you've recently had the harrowing experience of running over a cat. After the ooohh's, aaahh's & sympathetic noises have died down explain that what was harrowing was that it took you 4 goes to get the bas***d....

[vsquizz]

Anyone that gives greenies for cat jokes gets a greenie from me.

So I suppose I shouldn't tell the storey of why my kids have nicknamed my Bobcat "FlatCat". Like Cliff said, we have all grown up now .....

...it was an accident...trust me

Cheers

[routermaniac]

This is a really embarrassing confession, but I got to 300+ posts without realising about this greenie thing . Just a reflection of the fact that I ever read the instructions... The only time I did read it didnt make much difference anyway (ie setting up my workcentre! )

[Stuart]

So I suppose I shouldn't tell the storey of why my kids have nicknamed my Bobcat "FlatCat". Like Cliff said, we have all grown up now .....

...it was an accident...trust me

Cheers Squizzy

Is that Squizzy or Squishy?

[shaunburgess]

My dogs like cats, i just mix it in with their Pal......

[Jack E]

No, nothing like that Al, I was talking about criticism, not unfounded insults

[outback]

That's a cool signature Jack, dull avatar, but cool signature

[Jack E]

Yeah, I could use a new avatar since SWMBO now has the Disco and I have my new toy, A shiny red XR6 ute

Any tips on where to look for avatars?

[Ashore]

Anyone that gives greenies for cat jokes gets a greenie from me.

P

There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." - Unknown


"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." - Anonymous

"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow." - Jeff Valdez

"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb

"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." - Ellen Perry Berkeley

"One cat just leads to another." - Ernest Hemingway

"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." - Mary Bly

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." - Joseph Wood Krutch

"People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick

"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." - Anonymous

"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." - Hippolyte Taine

"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." - Ernest Menaul

"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." - Unknown

"Time spent with cats is never wasted." - Colette

"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well." - Missy Dizick

"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." - Colonial American proverb

"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." - Joseph Wood Krutch "Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit." - John S. Nichols

Like those


Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

[ozwinner]

Ford.com.au????

[Jack E]

Ashore,

No greenies for that lot.

They are all in favour of cats, why would post such a thing

[Ashore]

Ashore,

No greenies for that lot.

They are all in favour of cats, why would post such a thing

Ah it's what came up on Google
Worth a try..... and you can't say I ain't trying





Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

[Ashore]

Is this better

• Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? He set a new lap record.
• Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens.
• What is the difference between a cat and a comma? One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause.
• What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? A peeping tom.
• Why don't cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
• What is a cat's favourite song? Three Blind Mice.
• What did the freshman computer science major say when he was told that the work stations had mice? Don't you have a cat?
• What is a cat's way of keeping law & order? Claw Enforcement.
• How did a cat take first prize at the bird show? He just jumped up to the cage, reached in, and took it.
• Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court? For kitty littering.
• Why did the litter of communist kittens become capitalists? Because they finally opened their eyes.
• Why are cats better than babies? Because you only have to change a litter box once a day.
• What is the name of the unauthorized autobiography of the cat? Hiss and Tell.
• What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat? A big furry creature that purrs while it sits on your lap and squashes you.
• What does a cat do when it gets mad? It has a hissy fit.
• What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purrpatrator.
• What happened when the cat went to the flea circus? He stole the whole show!
• What is a cat's favourite colour? Purrrrrrrple!
• Where does a cat go when it loses its tail? The retail store.
• What does a cat like to eat on a hot day? A mice cream cone.
• What do cats use to make coffee? A purrcolator.
• What do you call a cat that has swallowed a duck? A duck filled fatty puss.
• If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws.
• Why is the cat so grouchy? Because he's in a bad mewd.
• If there are ten cats on a boat and one jumps off, how many cats are left on the boat? None! They were copy cats.
• Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you? That depends on whether you're a man or a mouse.
• How does the cat get its own way? With friendly purrsuasion.
• What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew.
• What has more lives than a cat? A frog because it croaks every night.
• What is a cat's favourite subject in school? HISStory.
• What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
• How do cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.
• What's happening when you hear "woof... splat... meow... splat?" It's raining cats and dogs.
• Why are cats such good singers? Because they're very mewsical.
• What do you call newborn kittens who keep getting passed from owner to owner? Chain litter.
• What is the cat's favourite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
• How many cats can you put into an empty box? Only one. After that, the box isn't empty.
• Why do you always find the cat in the last place you look? Because you stop looking after you find it.
• If a cat can jump five feet high, then why can't it jump through a three foot window? Because the window is closed.
• What is a cat's favourite movie? "The Sound of Mewsic."
• What does a cat that lives near the beach have in common with Christmas? Sandy Claws.
• Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can't? Your lap.
• Why did the cat put oil on the mouse? Because it squeaked.
• What side of the cat has the most fur? The OUT-side.
• What is a cat's favourite car? The Catillac.
• What kind of cat will keep your grass short? A Lawn Meower.
• Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of cats? Because each of them was guilty of purrjury.
• What do you use to comb a cat? A catacomb.
• Why did the cat run from the tree? Because it was afraid of the bark!
• Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide? Because he's always spotted.
• Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
  
  
  

[shaunburgess]

They are shocking:eek:

I've got one!

I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes!!!!!