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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    SW Sydney
    Age
    75
    Posts
    12

    Default Water in the Glass

    A well-known proverb states that an optimist would say a glass is
    half full, while a pessimist would say it is half empty. What would
    people of different professions and walks of life say?

    The BANKER would say that the glass has just under 50% of its net
    worth in liquid assets.

    The GOVERNMENT would say that the glass is fuller than if the
    opposition party were in power.

    The OPPOSITION would say that it is irrelevant because the present
    administration has changed the way such volume statistics are collected.

    The ECONOMIST would say that, in real terms, the glass is 25% fuller
    than at the same time last year.

    The PHILOSOPHER would say that, if the glass was in the forest and no
    one was there to see it, would it be half anything?

    The PSYCHIATRIST would ask, "What did your mother say about the glass?"

    The PHYSICIST would say that the volume of this cylinder is divided
    into two equal parts; one a colorless, odorless liquid, the other a
    colorless, odorless gas. Thus the cylinder is neither full nor empty.
    Rather, each half of the cylinder is full, one with a gas, one with a liquid.

    The SEASONED DRINKER would say that the glass doesn't have enough ice in it.
    Androgens Order
    Forgive your enemies, but never, ever forget their names.
    The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naïve forgive and forget; the wise forgive but never forget.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Mackay Qld
    Age
    50
    Posts
    1,039

    Default

    Amd the engineer says, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be
    Mick

    avantguardian

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Garvoc VIC AUSTRALIA
    Posts
    3,208

    Default

    The peasant says, give me the glass....

    glug glug,

    now theres nuthin left ter argue about
    Regards, Bob Thomas

    www.wombatsawmill.com

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    back in Alberta for a while
    Age
    69
    Posts
    1,133

    Default

    My ENGINEER would say, "The glass is the wrong size"
    bigger and the fluid level indicates it's time for a refill
    smaller and the fluid level indicates it's time for a drink


    ian

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Oberon, NSW
    Age
    64
    Posts
    0

    Default

    An ALCOHOLIC would say "who spiked my meths?"


    I may be weird, but I'm saving up to become eccentric.

    - Andy Mc

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Gosford
    Age
    57
    Posts
    4

    Default

    i think it is a part of an elaborate conspiricy feed to the public by asio when the real agenda is possibly some sort of terrorism scheme to devise a method of transfer of exposive building compound to every form of inteligence in the sydney metro area. then once meetings have started to discuss the actual philosify of the contents, the jar develops a small fracture actuated by a remote phone call to shatter the glass therfore letting the liquid contents mix with the core of the "said glass" causing a massive explosion disrupting the chain of command by knocking out the inteligece leval of univercities every where.
    just a thought

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    SW Sydney
    Age
    75
    Posts
    12

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by glen boulton View Post
    i think it is a part of an elaborate conspiricy feed to the public by asio when the real agenda is possibly some sort of terrorism scheme to devise a method of transfer of exposive building compound to every form of inteligence in the sydney metro area. then once meetings have started to discuss the actual philosify of the contents, the jar develops a small fracture actuated by a remote phone call to shatter the glass therfore letting the liquid contents mix with the core of the "said glass" causing a massive explosion disrupting the chain of command by knocking out the inteligece leval of univercities every where.
    just a thought


    Glen,Glen,Glen TOOOOOOOO much time on your hands.
    You need to get a proper job!!!!!!
    Androgens Order
    Forgive your enemies, but never, ever forget their names.
    The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naïve forgive and forget; the wise forgive but never forget.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Oberon, NSW
    Age
    64
    Posts
    0

    Default

    Now I know who replaced my half-glass of meths with water...
    I may be weird, but I'm saving up to become eccentric.

    - Andy Mc

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Mackay Qld
    Age
    50
    Posts
    1,039

    Default

    Surely wouldn't knock out too much intelligence in NSW
    Mick

    avantguardian

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Northern Sydney
    Age
    49
    Posts
    0

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gingermick View Post
    Amd the engineer says, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be
    Quote Originally Posted by ian View Post
    My ENGINEER would say, "The glass is the wrong size"
    bigger and the fluid level indicates it's time for a refill
    smaller and the fluid level indicates it's time for a drink


    ian

    I've always heard that the engineer says 'Lucky I kept half of my water in a redundant glass'...

    Cheers,
    Dave
    ...but together with the coffee civility flowed back into him
    Patrick O'Brian, Treason's Harbour

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