Managerium.

[macca2]

The heaviest element known to science is Managerium.

This element has no protons or electrons, but has a nucleus
made up of 1 neutron, 2 vice-neutrons, 5 junior vice-neutrons,
25 assistant vice-neutrons, and 125 junior assistant vice-
neutrons all going round in circles.

Managerium has a half-life of three years, at which time it
does not decay but institutes a series of reviews leading to
reorganization.

Its molecules are held together by means of the exchange of
tiny particles known as morons.

[echnidna]

Sounds like just the stuff for a boardroom table.