Another flight attendant

[Allan at Wallan]

This one is for "Wheelin" and follows on from
his last joke.

A "straight" flight attendant went to the Doctor
with a medical condition. The Doctor gave him
some tablets but told him not to eat anything by
mouth for one week. In fact, any food had to be
inserted up his back passage.

The Doctor said the tablets may have a side effect
and cause the patient to appear gay. In that case
he should return to the Doctor quickly.

Everything went well and the patient went back
after two weeks. However he had the traditional
appearance of a gay person with the hips
swaggering and other gay actions.

The Doctor said, "I thought I told you to come back
quickly if you showed signs of becoming gay".

The flight attendant replied, "I am not gay.
I am just having problems eating this Mintie".

Allan

______________________________________

I am not at all worried about dying
... but just hope I am not there at the time.

[munruben]

Reminds me of the time Barry went to the doctors because he was constipated and the doctor told him to use a suppository and come back the next day.
Barry returned the next day and the doctor asked if the suppository had fixed the constipation problem. "Nah" said Barry, "for what good that did, I just as well have shoved it up my backside"

[wheelinround]

both oldies Allan & John the jokes I mean not you oldies.

The Story of the Painter


There was a tradesman, a painter called Wayne, who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often would thin down paint to make it go a wee bit further.
As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Baptist Church decided to do a big restoration job on the painting of one of their biggest buildings. Wayne put in a bid, and because his price was so low, he got the job.
And so he set to erecting the trestles and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine.
Well, Wayne was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, and the sky opened, the rain poured down, washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Wayne clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.
Wayne was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got on his knees and cried: "Oh, God! Forgive me! What should I do?"
And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke…

"Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"

[Allan at Wallan]

Cant say any more at the moment
... off to the WWS to spend a few
more hard earned dollars.

Allan

__________________________________

I am not at all worried about dying
... but just hope I am not there at the time.