What we really mean when we say..

[munruben]

Statement: "I'm a Romantic."
True Meaning: "I'm poor."

Statement: "You're the only girl I've ever cared about."
True Meaning: "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."

Statement: "I really want to get to know you better."
True Meaning: "So I can tell my friends about it."

Statement: "She's kinda cute."
True Meaning: "I wouldn't kick her out of bed but a pillow over the head might be necessary."

Statement: "I don't know if I like her."
True Meaning: "She won't sleep with me."

Statement: "I had a wonderful time last night."
True Meaning: "Who are you?"

Statement: "Do you love me?"
True Meaning: "I've done something stupid and you might find out."

Statement: "Do you 'really' love me?"
True Meaning: "I've done something stupid and you're going to find out sooner or later."

Statement: "How much do you love me?"
True Meaning: "I've done something really stupid and someone's on their way to tell you by now.

Statement: "I've been thinking a lot."
True Meaning: "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."

Statement: "I think we should just be friends."
True Meaning: "You're ugly."

[Barry Hicks]

Like the man said - I have never been to bed with an ugly woman, but I have woken up with a few.

Barry Hicks

[joe greiner]

And isn't it amazing how they get so much better looking near last call for drinks?

Joe

[Barry Hicks]

Seems like an international problem Joe.

Barry Hicks