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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
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    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
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    74
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    Default Ersatz Spokeshave

    Whilst contemplating the meaning of life and other mysteries of the universe with the assistance of a bottle of shiraz, I made an amazing discovery.
    Potato peelers do NOT work as spokeshaves.
    Here endeth the lesson.
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Pambula
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    59
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    5,026

    Default

    ... but you can peel a spud with a spokeshave.

    "I don't practice what I preach because I'm not the kind of person I'm preaching to."

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    10

    Talking

    And removing the cork from the bottle of shiraz with a hand held electic drill leaves pieces of cork floating in the bottle!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Oxley, Brisbane
    Age
    79
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    537

    Default

    Not if you hold the bottle upside down while you are drilling it.
    Bob Willson
    The term 'grammar nazi' was invented to make people, who don't know their grammar, feel OK about being uneducated.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Kuranda, paradise, North Qld
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    63
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    Default

    And you can drive a 14 gauge roofing screw into the cork and pull it out with a claw hammer if you have no cork screw!

    Mick

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Perth, WA
    Age
    77
    Posts
    884

    Default

    And if you're really thirsty, you can push the cork straight down the neck of the bottle. When you tip the bottle over, the cork floats to the surface (now at the bottom of the inverted bottle) and the wine pours very smoothly into your glass. You need seriously strong thumbs if you're gonna drink more than one bottle (see the thread "Traditions):

    http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com...&threadid=8098

    Driver of the Forums
    Lord of the Manor of Upper Legover

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Oxley, Brisbane
    Age
    79
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    537

    Default

    Good one Mick I haddna thunk 'o that one.
    Bob Willson
    The term 'grammar nazi' was invented to make people, who don't know their grammar, feel OK about being uneducated.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
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    74
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    Default

    If you enjoy it that much, who needs a glass, which of course negates the problem that Bob Willson has encountered
    (which also shows he is 1# Refined 2# Not a drunk ).
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Queenslander
    Posts
    0

    Default

    And if you inadvertently take your private jet into one of the 'no alcohol' communities on Cape York and just happen to have a bottle of Shiraz (or Cab Sav) they may confiscate the jet and drink the red!
    Mal

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Kuranda, paradise, North Qld
    Age
    63
    Posts
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    Default

    Originally posted by Red neck
    And if you inadvertently take your private jet into one of the 'no alcohol' communities on Cape York and just happen to have a bottle of Shiraz (or Cab Sav) they may confiscate the jet and drink the red!
    No , they'll take the lowest ranking person present, sack them and make them the scapegoat.

    Mick

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