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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Toowoomba Qld.
    Age
    65
    Posts
    0

    Default M&F (different planets)

    Here's one I just got in the Inbox, and worth a laugh. It's not as 'blue' as it would first appear!

    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

    FOR EXAMPLE:
    One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

    I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time withher. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Let's get a pair for each outfit."

    We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

    I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,

    "WHAT?"

    I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,

    "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.

    Cheers
    Andy Mac
    Change is inevitable, growth is optional.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Canberra
    Age
    54
    Posts
    265

    Default

    Oldie but a goldie

    Pete
    If you are never in over your head how do you know how tall you are?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Queensland
    Posts
    613

    Default

    Pure Gold


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  1. my planets must be aligned...almost
    By mic-d in forum HAVE YOUR SAY
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    Last Post: 9th July 2005, 06:10 PM

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