Story time with uncle Dave

[Geoff Egan]

unincarcerate the young ladies from their place of incarceration and the one to win the honour was....

[macca2]

Roger the lodger who had his sights well and truly set on................

[Dazza007]

... sending the two lassies to Hong Kong and dye a from a Herion overdose while being pounded on a Hong Kong materess all night long. But I digress, for more recently our "Floating Gin Palace" had sprung a leak. This wasn't hard seeing as the whole boat was built upside down! So once again, Captain Smith (former Captain of the Titanic) was awe struck that he is again ....

[Dennis Hill]

...the master of a vessel that is to disapear, almost without trace, into the pages of history books, only to surface again on a buliten board where the readers are obsessed with wood, splinters and......
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(I can see them, they are just around the corner!!!!)

[macca2]

bull (sorry) saw dust, generated by a unknow number of noise producing machines that these afor mentioned woodies idolise, and would.............

[JackoH]

....cause them to completely ignore the charms of the aforementioned, aforementioned young ladies, who were trying to take the minds of the aforementioned woodies off their tools, in order that they might......
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.Confused?:confused:

[Dennis Hill]

...lure them into their den of iniquity, thereby enabling them to.....
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Hang about, didn't we kill off this pair of females a couple of days ago in Hong Kong??????

[macca2]

rise from the grave (there you go Mr Hill) so that they might once more............

[Geoff Egan]

go in search of the chivalrous woody and poet lorrakeet sir knucklehead so that they can...

[fxst]

down a few glasses of coona while applauding the exciting ..........

[JackoH]

...and confusing antics of Stoppers, who is desperately trying to get his new(?) boat to float upside down, having been told by the vendor that he always did it that way, but........

[Dennis Hill]

....as he was having little luck with the process, he went to consult an expert in the form of Admiral Nelson who was to be found in............

[Geoff Egan]

a rum sodden state trying to slip into Lady Emma Hamiltons..

[Dennis Hill]

....Chicken coup. Not only was our Admiral blind in one eye but the other eye was blind drunk and as his sense of smell was also a little worse for wear he mistook the chicken coup for the good Lady's........

[DaveInOz]

an lead the way into a bright future, in every yard a boat, and in every shed a panel saw.
This being his platform for election he was soundly routed and returned to life on the wooden boats, sextant in one hand and hand plane in the other.
Meanwhile Doorstop had figured how to right his sculpure in wood, titled mans inhumanity to boats, and was trying desperatly to .....