Enzo

[John Saxton]

Enzo, an 80-year-old Italian goes to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor

is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and as sharp as a tack; "..how

do you stay in such great physical condition?"



"I'm Italian and I am a golfer," says Enzo, "and that's why I'm in such good

shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways.

I have a glass of vino, and all is well."



"'Well' says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to

it. How old was your Father when he died?"

"Who said he was dead?"



The doctor is amazed. "'You mean you're 80 years old and your father's still

alive...how old is he?"



"He's 100 years old," says Enzo "In fact he golfed with me this morning, and

then we went to the topless beach for a walk ....and had a little vino and

that's why he's still alive.....he's Italian .....he's a golfer, too."



"Well," the doctor says, "that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than

that. How about your Father's Father? How old was he when he died?"



"Who said my grandfather ' s dead?"



Stunned, the doctor asks, "You mean you're 80 years old and your

grandfather's still living! Incredible, how old is he?"



"He's 118 years old" says the old Italian golfer.



The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, "So, I guess he went golfing

with you this morning too?"



"No, No he couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today."



At this point the doctor is close to losing it. "Getting married? Why would

a 118 year- old guy want to get married?"



"Who said he wanted to?

[Tomislav]

When I was asked to be MC for my "Best Man's Wedding" I was .. but then I realised the MC gets to snipe all night, the Best man get's one shot.

so wrapping up I had a confession to make.

"Ed, I have to apologise, and get something off my chest.
.....all of these years you have been getting Fathers day cards since Uni. it was me!

You see I would go into David Jones, they had tremendous customer service in those days, with a stamp and an address and ask the lovely young lady to write a fathers day card. You see I had my hand bandaged to excuse not writing the card!
So the lady wrote the card "Happy fathers Day Dad love XXX .." and and the address and posted it through internal mail. for about err. 6/7 years..? "

Every year he would ring and ask, did I do something .. and I truthfully replied.. " err dunno..."

The crowd loved it, the Bride.. well just say did not look best pleased.

Personally I think there was more to the story but he wasn't telling..