Ikea fun

[Tonyz]

Maybe this should be in joke page but..
earlier this week i was in Adelaide for 3 hours, enough already I was supposed to be picking up a friend at Ikea and as I was early had a wander around, never been in before nor likely to return...as you will see....................

All those twists and turns all the different rooms, thought Id have some fun and spotting two elderly ladies fluffing around, went up to them and said.

"Excuse me, you look like you have been in just a short time and I hope you can help me' they got all excited, "you see Ive been in here for 3 days and cant find my way out,"

poor old dears went into panic mode and one went running off to get assistance, I suddenly realised they had taken my joke seriously and I was now officially in the poo, so I tried making a run for it hoping to escape but one of the dears was running after me,'dont panic' she said, 'dont worry, my sister has gone to get help and get you out of here.

hells bells I finished up jumping checkouts, security after me and I dont know what else was going on.

If your ever in one of those strange mega shop places please dont try and be funny, it does nothing for the heart, nor the rental company I was driving for.

[DavidG]

I don't know what is worse. You getting lost? Or me knowing most of the short cuts through the place....

[Handyjack]

There have been times when I have been in and out in 10 minutes. Just need to know where you are going.

You now know the secret of Ikea stores. Trap you inside so you buy, or is it good bye?

[KBs PensNmore]

You obviously go in there on your own.
Went there once for a "quick look", eventually got out of there 5 hours later. So much for a quick look

[damian]

Yes the trick to ikea is not to take a woman with you. Look online work out what you want. Get a $1 hotdog, go straight to the end where it's all stacked up, out through the checkouts stack it all on the ute and get away quick as you can.

[KBs PensNmore]

[QUOTE=Tonto;2137007"Excuse me, you look like you have been in just a short time and I hope you can help me' they got all excited, "you see Ive been in here for 3 days and cant find my way out,"[/QUOTE]

Is that like going into a display home, making sure you have the business card of the sales rep handy, giving it a ring and saying that theres no paper in the toilet!!!!

[Grumpy John]

Yes the trick to ikea is not to take a woman with you. Look online work out what you want. Get a $1 hotdog, go straight to the end where it's all stacked up, out through the checkouts stack it all on the ute and get away quick as you can.

That's the way I do it, sans the hot dog.

[david.elliott]

Yes the trick to ikea is not to take a woman with you. Look online work out what you want. Get a $1 hotdog, go straight to the end where it's all stacked up, out through the checkouts stack it all on the ute and get away quick as you can.

[woodPixel]

My daughter, yesterday, bought two chairs and a dining table from Ikea.

I'm surprised at how solid and well made they are considering they were $75 (table) and $35 (each chairs).

I almost cursed her (WHY not come to me!!!) then I realised that for ~$130 I couldn't have even bought the wood, let alone make it.....

[rrich]

Ikea, Ikea. Oh my.

SWMBO has a friend bring over a chair for me to fix. It is an Ikea chair and part of a set of 8.

I get around to fixing and I discover that the hanger bolt that holds the back leg on is bent and must be replaced. You blokes would just run down to the local M&P hardware store and buy a replacement hanger bolt. Here there are no such things as 'child out of wedlock' hanger bolts. Here hanger bolts are all Imperial threads.

Not a big deal but I have to document on the bottom of the seat that the hanger bolt is Imperial.

As I'm repairing the chair, the sky opened up and with a lightening bolt a booming voice said "The chair wasn't assembled correctly, the nut wasn't tightened correctly." I looked up and said, "So?" The booming voice, again with a lightening bolt said, "The rest of the set wasn't assembled properly either." I'm standing there thinking, "Why do you get me into these messes?"

I go to the home center and buy some Imperial Loctite Red. I put the Loctite on the new hanger bolt and (blasphemy) put some Imperial Loctite Red on the metric hanger bolts.

Grudgingly I take the chair, tools and Loctite over to the friends house to do the rest of the chairs in the set.

[rustynail]

My daughter works with underprivileged young people in an adult education program. One of the homeless students, a nice young bloke, has been fronting up to class in a very fit and ready to go frame of mind. When my daughter asked him what had brought on the transformation, he informed her that he has been slipping into Ikea just before closing, tucking into bed and getting an excellent nights sleep, a quick washup in the bathroom next morning and he's ready to face the day as soon as the doors open.
Who said Ikea was useless?