It's a male thing

[John Saxton]

WHY MEN ARE SELDOM DEPRESSED


-- Men Are Just Happier People --


What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack...

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.



Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.



Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.



If someone forgets to invite you,

He or she can still be your friend.





Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.





You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes.

Men Are Just Happier People





NICKNAMES



If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.




EATING OUT



When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50.
None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators...YEP!!!



MONEY



A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.




BATHROOMS



A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.




ARGUMENTS



A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.




FUTURE



A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.




MARRIAGE



A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.



DRESSING UP



A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.




NATURAL



Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.




OFFSPRING



Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.



A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.




THOUGHT FOR THE DAY



A married man can forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people
remembering the same thing!



SO, send
this to the women who have a sense of humor . ......

and to the men who will enjoy reading it

[KBs PensNmore]

How true this is, speaking from experience, as I'm now on number 3. I know, some people never learn.

[fenderbelly]

How true this is, speaking from experience, as I'm now on number 3. I know, some people never learn.

Man you must be a glutton for punishment

[KBs PensNmore]

I know, just can't seem to be without one to warm the bed.

[Lyle]

Wonderful new invention called an electric blanket. Much cheaper to run.

[skot]

I know, just can't seem to be without one to warm the bed.

KB, if no. 3 hears that is the reason for marrying her.......you will be lookinfg for No. 4 shortly

[Allan at Wallan]

Lots of wisdom there John.
Ten out of ten just for typing it all up.

Allan

[scrapwood]

I linked into the thread above from clicking on the link that come in the WWF newsletter email. The link pops up in a different browser as a guest as my password connected browser is different ie not the default browser. However the page does load differently and immediately after the initial thread there was a Google Ad (ad not present when logged in formally), about Shaving Your Bikini Line, which Google's impressive sales advert algorithm comes up with an obviously hot topic in this Forum and men's sheds.

So it has me thinking what do we all shave our bikini line with, do you use a plane blade or are you a chisel person, is one brand better than the other, marples v stanley v titan, and to what angle to sharpen it, for your perfect finish before use?

[AlexS]

I linked into the thread above from clicking on the link that come in the WWF newsletter email. The link pops up in a different browser as a guest as my password connected browser is different ie not the default browser. However the page does load differently and immediately after the initial thread there was a Google Ad (ad not present when logged in formally), about Shaving Your Bikini Line, which Google's impressive sales advert algorithm comes up with an obviously hot topic in this Forum and men's sheds.

So it has me thinking what do we all shave our bikini line with, do you use a plane blade or are you a chisel person, is one brand better than the other, marples v stanley v titan, and to what angle to sharpen it, for your perfect finish before use?

...and should it be finished with wax, oil or WOP?

[ubeaut]

I linked into the thread above from clicking on the link that come in the WWF newsletter email. The link pops up in a different browser as a guest as my password connected browser is different ie not the default browser. However the page does load differently and immediately after the initial thread there was a Google Ad (ad not present when logged in formally), about Shaving Your Bikini Line, which Google's impressive sales advert algorithm comes up with an obviously hot topic in this Forum and men's sheds.

So it has me thinking what do we all shave our bikini line with, do you use a plane blade or are you a chisel person, is one brand better than the other, marples v stanley v titan, and to what angle to sharpen it, for your perfect finish before use?

Now here's an interesting tidbit. Google only shows ads on WWF that are in line with other sites you have looked at. Adult only ads and sites are blocked and so are some others like gambling sites.

So it begs the question.... What have you or someone else been looking at on that computer.

[doug3030]

So it has me thinking what do we all shave our bikini line with, do you use a plane blade or are you a chisel person, is one brand better than the other, marples v stanley v titan, and to what angle to sharpen it, for your perfect finish before use?

I am thinking a spokeshave, but definitely a wax finish

Cheers

Doug

[Christos]

I know, just can't seem to be without one to warm the bed.

Are you sleeping in the shed?

[scrapwood]

Hi Ubeaut,

That is an interesting tidbit. So Potentiallly one has the means of being informed randomly of what is being looked at by other users on the computer and possibly what they are up to. I have been doing alot research of marketing theory recently and one of those topics revolved around the marketing of Gillette in India, so potentially it does work. I also have been investigating Qantas marketing as well, but an ad has also appeared for P&O Cruises, does this mean that Google ads has made a connection there or can I expect some member in this household to disappear for a few weeks.

[John Saxton]

Lots of wisdom there John.
Ten out of ten just for typing it all up.

Allan

The joy of computers are truly a wondrous thing for C&P

[KBs PensNmore]

KB, if no. 3 hears that is the reason for marrying her.......you will be lookinfg for No. 4 shortly

Not married, have asked a couple of times, but keeps saying NO, suits me fine though, and there NEVER will be a number 4. Takes too long to train em right.
Yes, I know I'm a sexist pig, numbers 2 and 3 told me so.