A collection of truly awful one-liners

[Schtoo]

It's getting dangerously close to "why did the chicken cross the road?" stuff here.

Oh, what baby seal joke? Puhleeaze???

[AlexS]

Not the baby seal joke, but ...

Q. How do you catch a seal?
A. Cut a hole in the ice, and sprinkle peas around it. When the seal comes up for a pea, kick it in the icehole.

[davidt]

Schtoo,

check your PM's.

David

[julianx]

two eggs getting boiled in a pot of water, one egg says to the other "boy it's hot in here" the other one says "you think this is bad wait till you get out, they smash your head in and dig out your guts and eat them".

[Jack E]

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender sets the beer down and says, "For you, no charge!"

An atom walks in to a bar,
Atom - "I think I've lost an electron",
Bartender - "Are you sure?"
Atom - "Yes, I'm positive"

[gazaly]

A sausage and an egg are cooking in a frying pan.

The sausage says, "Boy its hot in here."

And the egg says,"Ahhhh, a talking sausage!!!"