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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Murray Bridge SA
    Posts
    293

    Default Why Irish jokes are so simple

    Hope this offends any one, Sorry DON'T offend anyone.


    Reilly went to trial for armed robbery. The jury foreman came out and announced, "Not guilty."

    "That's grand!" shouted Reilly. "Does that mean I can keep the money?"


    ////

    Finnegin:

    "My wife has a terrible habit of staying up 'til two o'clock in the morning. I can't break her of it."


    Keenan:

    "What on earth is she doin' at that time?"


    Finnegin:

    "Waitin' for me to come home."



    ///



    Murphy told Quinn that his wife was driving him to drink. Quinn thinks he's very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.



    ///


    An American lawyer asked, "Paddy, why is it that whenever you ask an Irishman a question, he answers with another question?"
    "Who told you that?" asked Paddy.

    //////

    Question - Why are Irish jokes so simple?
    Answer - So the English can understand them.







    Irish lass customer: "Could I be trying on that dress in the window?"
    Shopkeeper: "I'd prefer that you use the dressing room."



    Q. What do you call an Irishman who knows how to control a wife?
    A. A bachelor.







    Slaney phoned the maternity ward at the hospital. "Quick!" he said. "Send an ambulance, my wife is goin' to have a baby!"
    "Tell me, is this her first baby?" the intern asked.
    "No, this is her husband, Kevin, speakin'."




    Did you hear about the Irish newlyweds who sat up all night on their honeymoon waiting for their sexual relations to arrive?



    ////






    My mother wanted me to be a priest. Can you imagine giving up your sex life and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs?






















  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    lower eyre peninsular
    Age
    75
    Posts
    496

    Default

    Excellent, give da mon a drink, gawd knows he deserves one afda tinking dowes ones up.
    I would love to grow my own food, but I can not find bacon seeds

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