English Manglage

[Auld Bassoon]

Is it Y2K compliant?

It was five and a half years ago, but times change...

[Auld Bassoon]

Here's a recent memo from a manager:

G'day Zenwood,

Sorry I had to delete that passage, but I couldn't bear to read it again..

If that was a real memo to real people, he /she must live in "Alice's Palace" (a name/epithet I normally reserve for corporate HQ, as that's where the really <<<>>> folk live...)

God's teeth. What a lot of . I thinks I'd better stop now, and have a nice calming glass of red gargle juice

[Auld Bassoon]

One can never have an excess of lacquer on one's knackers.

Eh? Que? ? I must have missed something. I'm definately not spraying lacquer anywhere near there...

[Iain]

[/indent]have a nice calming glass of red gargle juice

Doing that rite noo, cee caint efen spel, hu gis a tos, bi orl....veever lar red

[craigb]

I must have missed something.

Yes you have.

Dare I say it?

Do a search

Or ask Col

[Driver]

Eh? Que? ? I must have missed something. I'm definately not spraying lacquer anywhere near there...

Steve

You're suffering from lack of data, mate. Rather than fill you in completely, allow me to gently introduce you to one of the BB's more engaging themes by suggesting that you do a search using the key words "Max Factor". Prepare to be amazed!

Col

[Iain]

Oh for a glamorous hammer

[AlexS]

Here's a recent memo from a manager:.....

99,100, change hands :eek:

Zen, the guy who wrote that wasn't PJH was it? I suspect I recognise the style.

[zenwood]

G'day Zenwood,
If that was a real memo to real people...

yep on both counts.

Zen, the guy who wrote that wasn't PJH was it? I suspect I recognise the style.

No it wasn't PJH. (I don't know who PJH is, but those aren't the author's initials.)

[Gingermick]

Discovered by one Irishman, Dr Seamus Rooner .

Just remembered one out of Fury by Salman Rushdie. The candidates in his
US election 2000 were Gush and Bore.
How apt.

[zenwood]

I had a strange feeling of deja-vu when I read this article by the same author, and in the same publication, as quoted previously.

From the Senior Leadership Team

In our Renewal journey we have all covered significant milestones in the pursuit of One [Organisation]. Since the [Organisation's] Renewal Program began in 2005 we have made considerable progress in transforming our culture, program and business processes. The Renewal process has been multi-faceted involving strategic, personal and organisational change.

In this article let me provide you an update on the client program side of Renewal and share with you my passion for your personal renewal as I am keenly interested in your personal well-being.

Client Program Update

In addition to celebrating 100 years of [the Organisation], we are also celebrating some major achievements, including a revitalisation of how we conduct our ... business, deliver the expanded client program and the underpinning management and support mechanisms. I am pleased that we now have a client program focused on some 2224 client deliverables through 180 tasks instead of 750 tasks we had in the previous year. This has been a tremendous achievement! How did we get here? It is only through your hard work, cooperation, willingness and of course the dedication of [my] Office and [the] Advisor Community. "A Simple Guide to [the] Organisation's Client Program" has been produced and will be released shortly to enable you to understand the re-energised program management.

The [Organisation's] client program prioritisation methodology has been endorsed by the [senior] Committee recently. The success of the client program relies on all of us being a part of One [Organisation], working together to support the needs of our clients and ensuring they are engaged and informed throughout.

Personal Renewal

We are working in a rapidly changing environment. Technology and [other] developments are occurring at an ever accelerating pace and [the] Organisation needs to evolve so it can readily respond to support [our client's] interests. Renewal is a shift of both intent (strategy) and organisational capabilities in anticipation or response to the external environment. You all contribute to [the] Organisation's capability. Personal transformation is fundamental to any cultural change and certainly a precursor to true leadership. And it is true leadership that transforms challenges into opportunities instead of barriers to the future.

The environment that supports achievement and innovation is essential for us to deliver our clients' expectations, and work towards our vision to be a world leader in [our product]. We can only do this through your leadership. But leadership is about developing increased awareness of self and the people we lead. This awareness comes only through personal renewal. Personal renewal unfolds your hidden power and hence transformation.

Simple Technique

How does one achieve personal renewal? This question has been around for a long time. You must strike a personal balance between work, family, social, physical, intellectual, and emotional aspects of life demanding your time. You shouldn't let these demands overwhelm you.

Here is a simple technique for personal renewal. It involves de-cluttering the mind to reduce stress and investing time in yourself! Set aside time for "self renewal" every day. This is your personal time and space to reflect on you. Use the same time of the day and every day. Sit down in a quiet place at your work, home or whereever [sic] it is convenient. Give yourself half an hour for dialogue between you and your inner self.

Turn your attention towards yourself and simply observe your thoughts consciously. You may notice thoughts subside and mental clutter slowly disappear. As the mind becomes calm, that inner dimension (awareness) starts to shine and may reveal you true leadership. Practice this twice a day, every day and experience the awareness in you!

I am sure that this awareness, together with your intellectual capital, will enable you to lead and create an even better future for ourselves and [the] Organisation.