Robo and the taxman

[MBM888]

The taxman decides to audit Robo, and summons him to the tax office. The tax auditor is not surprised when Robo shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the tax office finds that believable."

"I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it," says Robo. "How about a demonstration?"

The auditor thinks for a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead."

Robo says, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye."

The auditor thinks a moment and says, "It's a bet."

Robo removes his glass eye and bites it: the auditor's jaw drops. Robo says, 'Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye."

Now the auditor can tell Robo isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Robo removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Robo’s attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

"Want to go double or nothing?" Robo asks. "I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee backwards into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between."

The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there's no way this guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again.

Robo stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor's desk.
The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Robo’s attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.

"Are you okay…?" the auditor asks.

"Not really," says the attorney. "This morning, when Robo told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and urinate all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it.

[DaveTTC]

I cried laughing and couldn't finish reading it to my family.

[Rodgera]

Top of the class

[Sturdee]

At first glance I thought that there was a spelling mistake and a "b" missing in the name.

Then I read on and I realized I was wrong for our would never do that.

Peter.

[Jim Carroll]

At first glance I thought that there was a spelling mistake and a "b" missing in the name.

Then I read on and I realized I was wrong for our would never do that.

Peter.

You would not want to put money on that Peter

[Mulgabill]

You would not want to put money on that Peter

Sounds like another wager Jim!

[doug3030]

I actually knew a bloke who has an artificial leg who used to go from pub to pub betting people that he could keep one foot on the floor and touch the ceiling with the other foot.