Divorce Questions

[smidsy]

I got royally shafted by ex wife.

Throughout the marriage I was studying, she worked in accounts so I trusted her to manage the finances.
When we got married I had an NAB credit card with a $5k limit and about $3k owing, everytime NAB sent us a credit limit increase offer she would nag me until I signed - if I was hesitant she would wait until I had a heavy assignment due and ask me repeatedly when I was working on the assignment.
Eventually the NAB card got up to a $25k limit, she led me to believe there was only $10k owing on it. She also talked me in to getting a Coles Myer Source card, $10k limit with supposedly only about $1k on it and she also led me to believe both cards were in joint names.

Her "request to leave" the house we were renting was along the lines of "if you don't go I will and leave you to pay the rent" - as a student my income was about half what the rent was.
After I left is when I found out that both cards were not only maxed out, but also in my name alone.

She refused point blank to pay any of it, claiming that her credit rating was too bad to any credit, at one she said she would pay the source card if I reactivated her card and left it in my name.
I spoke to a lawyer at the time ($500 for the privelege thanks) who advised that the courts would look at contributions to the marriage, that the best I would get in court would be $10k but it would cost me $3k a day in fees over 3 or 4 days with no guarantee of a win.
When I moved out, she said it was to give her space for a month or so and that I would be back. For that reason I wasn't as forceful as I should have been about divying up the property. Between property and her share of the debt I reckon she took me for near $25k.

If she has half a brain, she will sign the papers and send them, because if I have to go to court I will chase the money and property as well.
As for the future, she earns a lot more than me so she won't chase me for any more.

If I die while she still has claim on me, well she lives in country WA and would take at least 48-72 hours to get here, my brother lives 5 minutes away, he has agreed that if I croak, he will have ten of his apprentices around here within an hour and this place will be stripped bare before she can think about booking a flight.

Big lesson learnt.
I've been in a relationship since, and I made sure I knew the details of every cent of our finances - love em, trust me, but double check and be informed.

[fenderbelly]

I hope it goes well for you.

[smidsy]

Thanks Fred.

[astrid]

Divorces can be nasty or amicable.
The best advice I can give is remove all emotion from the property settlement. Emotion feeds lawyers, not neccessarily because they are greedy but because they are bound to act on their client instructions.

AND are bound to represent you if the other side gets nasty.

So if the ex is not stirring up a pot, keep it simple, wear a few dollars, get it over.

One of the surest ways to "get back" at an ex is to nit pick etc file applications, his or her lawyer HAS to respond.

Problem is..... it usually costs the nit picking party double

[rustynail]

Hey Smidsy, just remember, you are going to have to find some one else to blame when the Missus is no longer around.

[smidsy]

I coulda used her for that just now:

Decided to pressure clean my balcony. go downstairs and fetch the hose, come back up, connect hose and power cord to presure cleaner, go back down to plug in hose and power cord and turn them on.
Pressure cleaner doesn't work when I switch it on.
Back down stairs to check power cord, change power points a few times while listening for the sound of the pressure cleaner.
Still no joy so unplug extension lead and bring it up stairs to a power point I use regularly and know is working - still no joy.
Next try another extension lead, next start wondering how long ago I bought it and if Masters will do so a swap or will I have to go through Karcher.
Then I remember - this thing doesn't make any noise until you actually pull the trigger.

In my defence I will say that I've only used it once before, it's a new toy.
I am wondering though if I can clean the bathroom with it....

[DavidG]

I am wondering though if I can clean the bathroom with it....

Only if you want to destroy the waterproofing.

[Master Splinter]

I use my Karcher to clean the bathroom when I'm doing a spring clean - works a treat, especially if you spray the shower/bath with Easy-off BAM (the one that contains sulphamic acid...so it's in a trigger pump pack NOT an aerosol) about ten minutes before!

(or you can buy your sulphamic acid from bunnies in powder form and mix up a 15% solution and squirt it on)
(may also be good for cleaning coffee machines, for any coffee fanatics)