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Thread: Handy machine

  1. 9th June 2011, 08:34 PM #1
    Allan at Wallan's Avatar
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    Default Handy machine

    An old "woodie", about my age, and not in the best
    of shape, decided to go for a workout in the Wallan gym
    when he spotted an absolutely beautiful woman.

    He asked his personal trainer, "What machine should I use
    to impress that young lady over there?"

    The trainer looked him up and down and replied,
    "I think you should start with the ATM near the front door".

    Allan
    Life is short ... smile while you still have teeth.
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  2. 9th June 2011, 10:18 PM #2
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    i'll pay that, the joke not the other
    Cheers Fred



    The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with the light on.
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  3. 10th June 2011, 08:36 PM #3
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    You only get what you pay for mate.
    Reality is no background music.
    Cheers John
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  4. 11th June 2011, 01:50 PM #4
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    What's an ATM??
    Androgens Order
    Forgive your enemies, but never, ever forget their names.
    The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naïve forgive and forget; the wise forgive but never forget.
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  5. 11th June 2011, 04:10 PM #5
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    Cool

    Quote Originally Posted by Rodgera View Post
    What's an ATM??
    1. Money cannot buy happiness but, somehow, it's more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes Benz than it is on a bicycle.
    2. Forgive your enemy. But remember the bastard's name.
    3. Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.
    4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
    5. Alcohol does not solve any problem. But then, neither does milk
    ​Scotty Heilander
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  6. 11th June 2011, 05:20 PM #6
    Allan at Wallan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rodgera View Post
    What's an ATM??
    Your education has been sadly neglected Rodgera

    ATM (Automatic Teller Machine)

    A machine that spits a few dollars out (from your own account)
    at the push of a couple of buttons.
    Life is short ... smile while you still have teeth.
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  7. 11th June 2011, 05:45 PM #7
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    Some people don't need to know about atm's, insufficient funds...
    I'm just a startled bunny in the headlights of life. L.J. Young.
    We live in a free country. We have freedom of choice. You can choose to agree with me, or you can choose to be wrong.
    Wait! No one told you your government was a sitcom?
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  8. 12th June 2011, 01:12 PM #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Allan at Wallan View Post
    Your education has been sadly neglected Rodgera

    ATM (Automatic Teller Machine)

    A machine that spits a few dollars out (from your own account)
    at the push of a couple of buttons.
    Gees I thought it was "Allan's The Man", what a let down
    Androgens Order
    Forgive your enemies, but never, ever forget their names.
    The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naïve forgive and forget; the wise forgive but never forget.
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  9. 12th June 2011, 01:33 PM #9
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    Oh, I thought an A & T Magazine.


    1A It's more comfortable to cry on a Persian carpet than a dirt floor.
    5A Troubles looked at through the bottom of a glass are only magnified.
    6 Money isn't every thing but it can buy most of what it's not.
    Regards
    Hugh

    Enough is enough, more than enough is too much.
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  10. 12th June 2011, 07:43 PM #10
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    Hahaha good one
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