A guy goes to a costume shop and says "I'm going to a costume party as Adam and I need fig leaf." The girl brings out a fig leaf.He says,"Not big enough." She brings out a bigger one.

He says,"Still not big enough."
She brings out a huge fig leaf. "he says,"Still not big enough."

She says,"Listen, Ace,why don't you just throw it over your shoulder and go as a gasoline pump?"

AND.........
A man takes his wife to the Adelaide show.
They start heading down the alley that houses the bulls.

The sign on the first bull's stall states:"This bull mated 50 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says,"He mated 50 times in a year isn't that nice?"

They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated :"This bull mated 65 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says,"This one mated 65 times last year.Thats over 5 times a month.You could learn from this one!"

They proceed to to the last bull and his sign said :"This bull mated 365 times last year."

The wife's mouth drops open and says,"WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY!!! You could really learn from this one."

The fed up man turns to his wife and says,"Go up and inquire if he had to f*** the same cow every day!"

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Johnno