Whats the funniest thing you have done in thre workshop

[Iain]

I saw this on an American post and I think it is worth sharing our moments of embarrassment here.
I will break the ice with the chainsaw that would not cut after a sharpening, until father informed me the chain was on back to front.
Over to you

[John Saxton]

Iain,A new meaning to negative rake!
Cheers

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Johnno

[RETIRED]

Gooday.

Watching a subby that I used to employ turn his first verandah post.

An ex employee trying to turn some legs with the lathe in reverse. Sharpened the chisel 5 times and took him 10 mins to wake up. Maybe the rolling on the floor gave it away.

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Ian () Robertson
"We do good turns every day"

[JackoH]

How many times has anyone put a bandsaw blade upside down (or should that be inside out?) The first and only time I did this I took it back to the shop (I won't tellyou where, but they should have known better) and they changed it for a new one!
John H.

[JackoH]

How about putting a bandsaw blade on upside down, or should that be inside out?
T'wouldnt cut. So I took it back to a well known shop and they exchanged it for another(they should have known better,) so I won't tell you where!
John H

[John Saxton]

Distractions in the workshop(mostly her indoors with another cuppa thinkin'that you're gonna dehydrate),anyway when first I started out w/turning was trying my hand at sharpening...or should I say attempting to put what I thought was a gonna be a good edge on a new bowl gouge when in she comes with the ol'cuppa yacking away whilst I'm at the grinder and hey....diverted attention ...wham nice new shape to chisel...thereby shortening life of said piece and her indoors with a few chosen words of traditional oz vernacular.Rather get me own cuppas in me own sweet time!
Cheers

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Johnno

[RETIRED]

Gooday.

John send your wife over to me, she couldn't keep up with the cuppas here.

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Ian () Robertson
"We do good turns every day"



[This message has been edited by (edited 26 August 2000).]

[Iain]

Got a couple which fortunately don't involve me ( I don't make mistakes ).
One was watching the Triton rep in Hardware House demonstrating a table saw, had a piece of 3" pine and was ripping it with the blade fully extended above the table, no guard. The fence was set for about 2" and he was happiliy sliding the timber with three fingers between the blade and the fence, I stood well back as I was wearing light coloured clothing and red would have clashed with my designer overalls. He somehow escaped injury.
The other was my father replacing a cat door after our fat little corgi managed to wedge herself in it and break it.
Step 1. Buy new door slightly larger than old door. 2. Using template supplied mark around door. 3. Smack out timber marked using hammer and screwdriver. 4. Fit new door with oversize flange (thank god) and hammer in phillips head screws to secure.
My fathers tool kit was basic to say the least and comprised of a flat screw driver (chipped) a hammer and a shifter, don't know why he needed a hammer when he could have used the end of the shifter.
He still has the audacity to criticise the tools I possess.

[John Saxton]

Yeah Iain,I can probably relate to a few good other persons episodes myself.One that does come to mind was a guy I saw wearing gloves whilst woodturning...he had bad dermatitus, but the gloves were loose with the fingers of the gloves cut out with frayed edges looking for an accident to happen.I put the suggestion to him to try the surgical gloves available that still gave the ability to 'feel' the work and protect his hands being snug fitting.I must add that I don't advocate wearing gloves with any motor driven equipment,in this instance the guy loved his WW and the only way he could deal with it as far as he was concerned was by using gloves.(I wonder if he still has his arms,hands fingers intact)


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Johnno

[Shane Watson]

This story is really not funny, but looking back at it???

When I was doing my apprenticeship there was a tradesman polisher. He had little knowledge of machinery, but was confident. Anyway using the table saw to cut some 3mm ply seemed like a simply task... Unfortunately he had lowered the blade to be just higher than the ply.... I don't think I need to say any more... But for those who can't figure it out.. The Ply was picked up by the blade and was then caught and thrown back around toward the guy and promptly smacked the guy in his pride and joy!

Needless to say he spent some time in bed.......

Mind you, I learnt a valuable lesson that day... Whenever I cut ply I always remember that incident!

If anything this story really highlights the need to know how to use machinery safely.

Cheers

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Shane Watson..

Combine Love & Skill & You Can Expect A Masterpiece!

[Iain]

Shane, one should never laugh at the misfortunes of others.............................even if it is funny!

[AlexS]

At the Sydney Working with wood show a couple of years ago with a blind friend, also a woodie. The chap demoing the panasonic rechargeable circular saw recognised my mate, & knowing that he was competent with most tools, asked if he'd like a go. The funny part was watching all the other bystanders madly trying to hand-signal that the bloke was blind.

[ubeaut]

Many years ago our old French Polishing instructor John Horton (now polishing for the big boss in the sky) was showing his method of spiriting off to a class full of old ladies. The method he employed was to spit on to the work then rub briskly with the palm of his hand thus bringing the oil to the surface of the polish.

He worked up a mouth full of saliva, took a deep breath and spat ....... but with a little too much enthusiasm. His false teeth flew out of his mouth hit the table and sailed across the room landing on the dust filled floor. Of course with this the class completely broke up with laughter.

His finale was to stride across the room pick up the teeth wipe then uncerimoniously on his polish laden dust coat a shove them straight back into his gob. This changed the laughter to a class full of completely grossed out women. You see John had a habbit of wiping everything on his dust coat, hands, brushes, even old paint stripper.

Did you know that old dried paint stripper, under a denture plate and mixed with saliva starts to foam wildly after about 5 minutes. I will leave the rest to your imagination.

Not the only wierd story to come from that class.

Cheers - Neil

[RETIRED]

Probably did nothing for his palate either

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Ian () Robertson
"We do good turns every day"