A HEARTWARMING STORY

Declan the humble crab and Kate the Lobster Princess were madly, deeply
and passionately in Love. For months they enjoyed an idyllic
relationship until one day Kate scuttled over to Declan in tears.

"We can't see each other anymore...." she sobbed.

"Why?" gasped Declan.

"Daddy says crabs are too common," she wailed. "He claims you're a mere
crab, and a poor one at that, are the lowest class of crustacean... and
that no daughter of his will marry someone who can only walk sideways."

Declan was shattered, and scuttled sideways away into the darkness and
to drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion.

That night, the great Lobster Ball was taking place. Lobsters came from
far and wide, dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess refused
to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father's side,
inconsolable.

Suddenly the doors burst open, and Declan the crab strode in. The
Lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King
Lobster rose from his throne.

Slowly, painstakingly, Declan the crab made his way across the floor
... and all could see that he was walking not sideways, but FORWARDS,
one claw after another! Step by step he made his approach towards the
throne, until he finally looked King Lobster in the eye.

There was a deadly hush.

Finally, the crab spoke..............

"F#%$, I'm ."