Robbie the mean Scotsman was dying and all his close family had gathered round his bedside. Robbie asked if all his family was at his bedside. and one by one they answered the old man. "Yes dad, I am here" said his son Angus "Me too" said his daughter Kathleen" and all his children and family told the old man they were there at his bedside.
Robbie, pulled himself up with great effort and said "and is my lovely wife Lizzy here"
"Aye, I am that" said Lizzy.
Robbie pulled himself up even further in the bed and opened his eyes so he could see properly and in a croaky voice said "If you are all here, Why is the light on in the kitchen"?