Cards You'll Never See In Hallmark

[Wood Butcher]

"Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder:.............
What was I thinking?"fficeffice" />>>

"Congratulations on your wedding day!.............
Too bad no one likes your wife.">>

"How could two people as beautiful you............
have such an ugly baby?">>

"I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love.........
After having met you, I've changed my mind.">>

"I must admit, you brought Religion in my life...........
I never believed in Hell until I met you.">>

"As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am.......
that you're not here to ruin it for me.">>

"As you grow older, Mum, I think of all the gifts you've given me. Like the need for therapy...">>

"Thanks for being a part of my life!!!..........
I never knew what evil was before this!">>

"Before you go,.........
I would like you to take this knife out of my back. You'll probably need it again.">>

"Someday I hope to get married............
but not to you.">>

"You look great for your age.......
Almost Lifelike!">>

"When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.........
Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.">>

"I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend.......
So here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys.">>

"We have been friends for a very long time...........
What do you say we call it quits?">>

"I'm so miserable without you..................
It's almost like you're here.">>

"Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...............
Did you ever find out who the father was?">>

"You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket....
I'd miss you heaps and think of you often.">>

"Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday..............
So we're having you put to sleep.">>

[silentC]

"You look great for your age.......
Almost Lifelike!"

Hate to tell you but we bought a card with that on it for friend last year

[Ben from Vic.]

"Congratulations on your wedding day!.............
Too bad no one likes your husband"

And I could have done eith one of these just six months ago! :eek: