Dingo

An Australian goes on a safari in Africa, taking his pet dingo
along for company.

One day, the dingo starts chasing butterflies and before long
discovers that he is lost. Wandering about, he notices a
leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious
intention of having lunch. The dingo thinks, "Geez, I'm in deep
trouble now!"

Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and
immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back
to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap,
the dingo exclaims loudly, "Bugger me dead, that was one
delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid stride, as
a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the
trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was close. That dingo
nearly had me."

Meanwhile, a monkey had been watching the whole scene from a
nearby tree. He figures he can put this knowledge to good use
and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes.
But the dingo sees him heading after the leopard with great
speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon
catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a
deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is furious at
being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back
and see what's going to happen to that conniving Aussie dingo."

The dingo sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back,
and thinks, "Struth, what am I going to do now?" But instead
of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers,
pretending he hasn't seen them yet. Just when they get close
enough to hear, the dingo says, "Where the bloody hell is that
monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another
leopard."