Bundy

I rode to the bottle shop today on my bicycle, bought a bottle of Bundy rum, and put it in the bicycle basket.
As I was about to leave, I thought to myself that if I fell off the bicycle, the bottle would break.
So I drank all the Bundy before I cycled home.

It turned out to be a VERY wise decision, because I fell of that bike seven times before I got home.

Have not heard that one before Kryn - consider it recycled now.

You did well to remember how many times you fell off

A mate of mine went to the hotel, and was there pretty well all night, when he went to go home, he kept falling out of his chair, this happened several times, so he decided to crawl home. In the morning the phone rang, his wife answered the phone, when she got off the phone, she berated him for coming home so drunk.
His reply was "How do you know I was drunk" she replied "that was Paddy the publican on the phone, you left your wheelchair there again!!"