Ersatz Spokeshave

[Iain]

Whilst contemplating the meaning of life and other mysteries of the universe with the assistance of a bottle of shiraz, I made an amazing discovery.
Potato peelers do NOT work as spokeshaves.
Here endeth the lesson.

[silentC]

... but you can peel a spud with a spokeshave.

:D

[DPB]

And removing the cork from the bottle of shiraz with a hand held electic drill leaves pieces of cork floating in the bottle!:D

[Bob Willson]

Not if you hold the bottle upside down while you are drilling it.

[journeyman Mick]

And you can drive a 14 gauge roofing screw into the cork and pull it out with a claw hammer if you have no cork screw!:D

Mick

[Driver]

And if you're really thirsty, you can push the cork straight down the neck of the bottle. When you tip the bottle over, the cork floats to the surface (now at the bottom of the inverted bottle) and the wine pours very smoothly into your glass. You need seriously strong thumbs if you're gonna drink more than one bottle (see the thread "Traditions):

http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com.au/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8098

:D :D :D :D

[Bob Willson]

Good one Mick I haddna thunk 'o that one.

[Iain]

If you enjoy it that much, who needs a glass, which of course negates the problem that Bob Willson has encountered
(which also shows he is 1# Refined 2# Not a drunk :D ).

[Red neck]

And if you inadvertently take your private jet into one of the 'no alcohol' communities on Cape York and just happen to have a bottle of Shiraz (or Cab Sav) they may confiscate the jet and drink the red!

[journeyman Mick]

Originally posted by Red neck
And if you inadvertently take your private jet into one of the 'no alcohol' communities on Cape York and just happen to have a bottle of Shiraz (or Cab Sav) they may confiscate the jet and drink the red!
No , they'll take the lowest ranking person present, sack them and make them the scapegoat.

Mick