Barry Hicks
4th August 2008, 11:45 AM
In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli,
cauliflower, spinich and green, yellow and red vegetables
of all kinds so Man and Woman would live long and
healthy lives.
Then, abusing God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Dairy
Ice Cream and Magnums and said, "You want hot fudge
with that?"
Man said, "Yes" and Woman said, "I'll have one too with
chocolate chips." So they each gained five kilos.
Next, God created healthy yoghurt so that Woman might
keep her figure that Man found so fair.
But Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and
sugar from the cane and Woman went from size 12 to size 14.
God said, "Try my fresh green salad" but Satan presented
blue cheese dressing with garlic crutons on the side. Man
and Woman had to unfasten their belts following that repast.
God said, "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil
in which to cook them.
But Satan brought forth deep fried coconut king prawns,
butter-dipped lobster chunks, battered chicken and fried
steaks so Man's cholesterol went through the roof.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and
brimming with potassium and good nutrition.
Satan peeled off the health skin, sliced the starchy centre
into chips and deep fried them in animal fats, adding
copious quantities of salt... and Man put on more kilos.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children
might loose that extra weight but Satan came forth with cable
TV and a remote control so man would not have to toil
changing channels. Man and Woman laughed and cried
before the flickering light and started wearing stretch
jogging suits.
Then God gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer
calories and still satisfy his appetite.
But Satan created McDonalds and the 99c cheeseburger
and he asked, "You want fries with that?" Man replied, "Yes,
and super size 'em." Satan said, "It is good." and man and
woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed.....and created quadruple by-pass surgery.
Satan chuckled and created Medicare.
cauliflower, spinich and green, yellow and red vegetables
of all kinds so Man and Woman would live long and
healthy lives.
Then, abusing God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Dairy
Ice Cream and Magnums and said, "You want hot fudge
with that?"
Man said, "Yes" and Woman said, "I'll have one too with
chocolate chips." So they each gained five kilos.
Next, God created healthy yoghurt so that Woman might
keep her figure that Man found so fair.
But Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and
sugar from the cane and Woman went from size 12 to size 14.
God said, "Try my fresh green salad" but Satan presented
blue cheese dressing with garlic crutons on the side. Man
and Woman had to unfasten their belts following that repast.
God said, "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil
in which to cook them.
But Satan brought forth deep fried coconut king prawns,
butter-dipped lobster chunks, battered chicken and fried
steaks so Man's cholesterol went through the roof.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and
brimming with potassium and good nutrition.
Satan peeled off the health skin, sliced the starchy centre
into chips and deep fried them in animal fats, adding
copious quantities of salt... and Man put on more kilos.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children
might loose that extra weight but Satan came forth with cable
TV and a remote control so man would not have to toil
changing channels. Man and Woman laughed and cried
before the flickering light and started wearing stretch
jogging suits.
Then God gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer
calories and still satisfy his appetite.
But Satan created McDonalds and the 99c cheeseburger
and he asked, "You want fries with that?" Man replied, "Yes,
and super size 'em." Satan said, "It is good." and man and
woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed.....and created quadruple by-pass surgery.
Satan chuckled and created Medicare.