What NOT To Give Her For Valentines Day

[Rodgera]

1. A box of chocolates, clumsily rearranged in an attempt to hide
the fact you ate all the caramel ones.

2. Any food item with the words "diet", "light", or "high fiber" on
the label.

3. Any video starring Sylvester Stallone or Jim Carrey.

4. Flowers from a hospital's gift shop -- or worse, a mortuary's.

5. Any household appliance, power tool or other item from Bunnings.

6. A gift certificate fron Carbatec.
7. Cash.

8. Anything you could have bought at the petrol station shop on
the way over, even if you didn't.

9. An apologetic look and the words "That was today?":doh:

[tea lady]

What to give her (OK Me. :D).

*A plant in a pot. (I hate that flowers die.)

*chocolates in my favorite flavour, even if you don't like them.

*champagne liquor, (OK any liquor)

*a sleep in (For any that are mums- the most valuable thing.)

*cook dinner without asking what I want. (Most grateful for not having to think about it.)

*only acceptable gift voucher is from a shoe shop. (In a box of choccies of course.:D)

[DavidG]

Ok so what do I do.
Flowers - She suffers from hay fever.

Chocolate - She is on a diet after the overseas trip.

Jewelry - She like Chinese yellow 22ct gold. Can not buy it in AU.

Holiday - She has just been overseas for 5 weeks whilst I repainted the master bedroom and bought bedroom new furniture.

Cloths - She has two wardrobes full of them and suitcases full that she brought back from the trip.

????????????

Dinner out - See diet.....

[Fuzzie]

DavidG,

You didn't understand the mention of shoes above. And it wasn't even between the lines .....

[DavidG]

I forgot to mention the 6 pair she brought back with her.

[tea lady]

Uuuum! Maybe give her some time actually in the bedroom?:roll:

[Gingermick]

I got her a nice new vacuum cleaner.

[bsrlee]

DaveG

A shoe storage cabinet with plenty of extra space. For inspiration see the beginning of the movie 'Overboard' with Goldie Hawn.

[Fuzzie]

I forgot to mention the 6 pair she brought back with her.

How long have you been playing this game? Those ones don't count. There is no such concept as enough shoes. :D

[DavidG]

How long have you been playing this game? Those ones don't count. There is no such concept as enough shoes. :D
:doh:

[Skew ChiDAMN!!]

4. Flowers from a hospital's gift shop -- or worse, a mortuary's.

Or a cemetary. (Not recommended for anniversaries (http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com.au/showthread.php?t=28969) either. :B)

[DavidG]

Uuuum! Maybe give her some time actually in the bedroom?:roll:
With or without me. :;

[RufflyRustic]

I don't go for shoes that much, but I'd Love a gift voucher for my favourite handbag shop. I keep wearing out my handbags, probably because I keep filling them with stuff from hardware shops:rolleyes::D (after paying for the stuff, of course:p)


I reckon I'll get "I see I bought you some flowers again, what are they this time?" and "what's for tea?" and then "see, I ate it all!" :rolleyes::)

cheers
Wendy

[Incoming!]

When you get out of the car this evening - put on a Zorro mask and cape, a fake accent, and crawl through the lounge window (too much to hope for a swinging rope) with a bunch of flowers in your hand. Do not crumble under pressure, do not drop the fake accent, and let your new persona do the work. Recite poetry, smother her hand and arm with breathless kisses and threaten to kill yourself if she does not succumb to your passionate advances. Theaten to kill her husband, the unromantic fink, tell her that he is not worthy of her etc etc.

That, or put on a loin cloth and be her bath slave for the evening.

have fun.

[RETIRED]

You must be fun to live with.:wink::D

[tea lady]

When you get out of the car this evening - put on a Zorro mask and cape, a fake accent, and crawl through the lounge window (too much to hope for a swinging rope) with a bunch of flowers in your hand. Do not crumble under pressure, do not drop the fake accent, and let your new persona do the work. Recite poetry, smother her hand and arm with breathless kisses and threaten to kill yourself if she does not succumb to your passionate advances. Theaten to kill her husband, the unromantic fink, tell her that he is not worthy of her etc etc.

That, or put on a loin cloth and be her bath slave for the evening.

have fun.

You're just sending big hints to your other half. :((Actually not a bad idea.:cool:Hmmmm! Accidently send email?:doh:

[wheelinround]

and a cuppa tea

[wheelinround]

There''s an offer you can't refuse Tea lady

[Eli]

Does a thousand bucks worth of oak flooring with free no hassle custom installation count for anything?

No?

Yeah, I guess you're right honey, I WAS going to do it anyway, and I did buy myself a secret nailer, but it's OUR bedroom! I love you. :B

Great dinner thanks.

[Christopha]

Ok so what do I do.
Flowers - She suffers from hay fever.

Chocolate - She is on a diet after the overseas trip.

Jewelry - She like Chinese yellow 22ct gold. Can not buy it in AU.

Holiday - She has just been overseas for 5 weeks whilst I repainted the master bedroom and bought bedroom new furniture.

Cloths - She has two wardrobes full of them and suitcases full that she brought back from the trip.

????????????

Dinner out - See diet.....

STREWTH MATE!!!
Get rid of her quick, you could have real woman who isn't fat, weighed down with your retirement fund on her wrists, likes to take you with her when she goes on fishing holidays and all for much less money!