Barry_White
25th November 2007, 07:52 AM
Here you go four for the price of one.
<o:smarttagtype name="City" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"><o:smarttagtype name="place" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"><o:smarttagtype name="time" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"></o:smarttagtype></o:smarttagtype></o:smarttagtype>Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.
She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his
dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
possessions stolen.
I call the police for help, and what do they do?
They send me a BLIND policeman."
A redhead walks into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.
She sits down next to this blonde at the bar and stares up at the
TV. The 10:00 news was on. The news crew was covering a story of a
man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The redhead
turns to the blonde and says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." The redhead placed $20
dollars on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a
swan dive off of the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 dollars to the
redhead and said, "All is fair. Here is your money." The redhead
replies, "Honey, I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
o'clock news and knew he would jump." The blonde replies, "I did too,
but I didn't think he'd do it again."
A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll
take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?" The agent
replies, "Just a minute..."
"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.
One day, a dumb blonde decides she's had enough with the world and wants to commit suicide.
So she goes deep into a forest carrying a rope and a stool. She then stopped at a fairly high and
sturdy tree branch and started making the preparations to hang herself.
15 minutes later, a man walks down a forest path and sees a dumb blonde hanging from a tree
branch by her waist.
The man looked puzzled for a sec and then asks the dumb blonde,
"Are you trying to commit suicide?"
"Yes," the dumb blonde replied.
"Then shouldn't the rope be tied around your neck?" the man asked.
"I tried that," the dumb blonde replied, "but I couldn't breathe!"
<o></o>
<o:smarttagtype name="City" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"><o:smarttagtype name="place" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"><o:smarttagtype name="time" namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com<img src=" images="" smilies="" sad="" shock.gif="" border="0" alt="" title="Shock" smilieid="413" class="inlineimg"></o:smarttagtype></o:smarttagtype></o:smarttagtype>Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.
She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his
dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
possessions stolen.
I call the police for help, and what do they do?
They send me a BLIND policeman."
A redhead walks into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.
She sits down next to this blonde at the bar and stares up at the
TV. The 10:00 news was on. The news crew was covering a story of a
man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The redhead
turns to the blonde and says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." The redhead placed $20
dollars on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a
swan dive off of the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 dollars to the
redhead and said, "All is fair. Here is your money." The redhead
replies, "Honey, I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
o'clock news and knew he would jump." The blonde replies, "I did too,
but I didn't think he'd do it again."
A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll
take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?" The agent
replies, "Just a minute..."
"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.
One day, a dumb blonde decides she's had enough with the world and wants to commit suicide.
So she goes deep into a forest carrying a rope and a stool. She then stopped at a fairly high and
sturdy tree branch and started making the preparations to hang herself.
15 minutes later, a man walks down a forest path and sees a dumb blonde hanging from a tree
branch by her waist.
The man looked puzzled for a sec and then asks the dumb blonde,
"Are you trying to commit suicide?"
"Yes," the dumb blonde replied.
"Then shouldn't the rope be tied around your neck?" the man asked.
"I tried that," the dumb blonde replied, "but I couldn't breathe!"
<o></o>