Sculptured Box
1st March 2007, 06:32 PM
<tt> Bad day at work???
</tt><tt> Bad day at work???</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma!</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> This is even funnier when you realize it's real!</tt>
<tt> Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in </tt><tt>Louisiana.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> She then sent it to a radio station in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Needless to say, she won.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Hi Sue,</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.</tt>
<tt> Last week I had a bad day at the office.</tt>
<tt> I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I </tt><tt>would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.</tt>
<tt> I wear a suit to the office.</tt>
<tt> It's a wetsuit.</tt>
<tt> This time of year the water is quite cool.</tt>
<tt> So what we do to keep warm is this:</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> We have a diesel-powered industrial water heater.</tt>
<tt> This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea, </tt><tt>heats it to a delightful temperature, then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose which is taped to the air hose.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several </tt><tt>times with no complaints.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit.</tt>
<tt> This floods my whole suit with warm water.</tt>
<tt> It's like working in a Jacuzzi.</tt>
<tt> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my bum started to itch.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> So, of course, I scratched it.</tt>
<tt> This only made things worse.</tt>
<tt> Within a few seconds my bum started to burn!</tt>
<tt> I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.</tt>
<tt> In agony I realized what had happened.</tt>
<tt> The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish </tt><tt>couldn't stick to it.</tt>
<tt> However, the crack of my bum was not as fortunate.</tt>
<tt> When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually </tt><tt>grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my bum.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the</tt>
<tt> communicator.</tt>
<tt> His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.</tt>
<tt> Needless to say I aborted the dive.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression</tt>
<tt> stops totalling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.</tt>
<tt> When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my bum as soon as I got in the chamber.</tt>
<tt> The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poo for two days </tt><tt>because my bum was swollen shut.</tt>
<tt> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how </tt><tt>much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ????.</tt>
<tt> Now repeat to yourself, I love my job, I love my job, I love my </tt><tt>job.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!</tt>
</tt><tt> Bad day at work???</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma!</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> This is even funnier when you realize it's real!</tt>
<tt> Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in </tt><tt>Louisiana.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> She then sent it to a radio station in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Needless to say, she won.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Hi Sue,</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.</tt>
<tt> Last week I had a bad day at the office.</tt>
<tt> I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I </tt><tt>would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.</tt>
<tt> I wear a suit to the office.</tt>
<tt> It's a wetsuit.</tt>
<tt> This time of year the water is quite cool.</tt>
<tt> So what we do to keep warm is this:</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> We have a diesel-powered industrial water heater.</tt>
<tt> This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea, </tt><tt>heats it to a delightful temperature, then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose which is taped to the air hose.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several </tt><tt>times with no complaints.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit.</tt>
<tt> This floods my whole suit with warm water.</tt>
<tt> It's like working in a Jacuzzi.</tt>
<tt> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my bum started to itch.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> So, of course, I scratched it.</tt>
<tt> This only made things worse.</tt>
<tt> Within a few seconds my bum started to burn!</tt>
<tt> I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.</tt>
<tt> In agony I realized what had happened.</tt>
<tt> The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish </tt><tt>couldn't stick to it.</tt>
<tt> However, the crack of my bum was not as fortunate.</tt>
<tt> When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually </tt><tt>grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my bum.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the</tt>
<tt> communicator.</tt>
<tt> His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.</tt>
<tt> Needless to say I aborted the dive.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression</tt>
<tt> stops totalling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.</tt>
<tt> When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my bum as soon as I got in the chamber.</tt>
<tt> The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poo for two days </tt><tt>because my bum was swollen shut.</tt>
<tt> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how </tt><tt>much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ????.</tt>
<tt> Now repeat to yourself, I love my job, I love my job, I love my </tt><tt>job.</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?</tt>
<tt> </tt>
<tt> May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!</tt>