John Saxton
7th November 2006, 09:45 PM
>> Bryan came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as
>> he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.
>>
>>
>> He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a
>> strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white
>> robe.
>>
>>
>> "Who the hell are you?" Demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my
>> bedroom?".
>>
>>
>> The mysterious Man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter".
>>
>>
>> Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much to
>> live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family.... you've got to send me
>> back straight away".
>>
>>
>> St Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch.
>> We can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
>>
>>
>> Brian was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his
>> house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
>>
>>
>> A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
>> pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this
>> strange feeling welling up inside him.
>>
>>
>> The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen,
>> how are you enjoying your first day here?"
>>
>>
>> "It's not so bad" replies Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside
>> like I'm about to explode".
>>
>>
>> "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
>> laid an egg before".
>>
>>
>> "Never" replies Brian "Well just relax and let it happen" And so he did
>> and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under
>> his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions
>> got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
>>
>>
>> When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
>> and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
>> ever happened to him... ever!!!
>>
>>
>> The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
>> felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
>>
>>
>> shouting "Brian, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting the bed".
>>
>> he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.
>>
>>
>> He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a
>> strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white
>> robe.
>>
>>
>> "Who the hell are you?" Demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my
>> bedroom?".
>>
>>
>> The mysterious Man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter".
>>
>>
>> Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much to
>> live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family.... you've got to send me
>> back straight away".
>>
>>
>> St Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch.
>> We can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
>>
>>
>> Brian was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his
>> house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
>>
>>
>> A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
>> pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this
>> strange feeling welling up inside him.
>>
>>
>> The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen,
>> how are you enjoying your first day here?"
>>
>>
>> "It's not so bad" replies Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside
>> like I'm about to explode".
>>
>>
>> "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
>> laid an egg before".
>>
>>
>> "Never" replies Brian "Well just relax and let it happen" And so he did
>> and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under
>> his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions
>> got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
>>
>>
>> When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
>> and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
>> ever happened to him... ever!!!
>>
>>
>> The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
>> felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
>>
>>
>> shouting "Brian, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting the bed".
>>