1955

[John Saxton]

Subject: No Sex Since 1955

An old but still ruggedly handsome Sergeant Major found himself at a
gala
event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of
extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached
the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you
seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks
like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You
know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally,
the
young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way,
but
when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking
everything so seriously!? I mean, no sex since 1955!?"

Feeling charitable and a little bit drunk, she took his hand and led him
to
a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and
said,
"Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact
voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."