Carpet layers

[silentC]

It must be a terrible job coming in and laying carpet. All the other trades have been and gone. The floors have been swept. The paint has dried. There's power for your radio, a toilet to use, a kitchen to make tea. But they still find something to complain about.

When the guy came to measure up a few weeks ago, he looked at the doors and said "you'll have to take some off the bottom of those doors". I thought to myself that it must be good to have laser vision that allows you to measure the gap under a door whilst standing 6 feet away from it. So I diligently checked a few and they were all 20mm off the floor as the carpenter was instructed to make them.

Then this morning, the carpet layer turns up. I get a phone call from the old man "we have a bit of a problem with the doors and the carpet. He says they're all going to have to come off and will need to be cut down". "Bullsh*t", I say, "there's 20mm. How much does he need?". A bit of mumbling in the background. "He says a knuckle".

Now I'm starting to get the picture. The first guy has laser vision and can measure down to the millimetre with a single glance from 15 paces. This guy uses his knuckle and has long arms so he can reach all of the doors in the house from the front room. I'm guessing he thinks he has laser vision too. The knuckle reference probably springs to mind because he has carpet burns on his from where they drag on the floor when he walks.

I said to the old bloke "did you measure any of them? I checked a few and they were all 20mm". He goes off with the tape and comes back. "They're all 20mm except for one, which is about 15mm." "OK," I say, "take that one off and we'll plane it down if it needs it. The others can stay on".

He should have just said "can you take all the doors off to make my life easier?" Might have been inclined to do it but not now that he has tried one on.

[bitingmidge]

Hmmm, given a choice between taking doors off and neatly stacking them somewhere away from freshly painted walls, or coming home to find the carpet layer has taken them off...........

I may have made a different call!

P
:D :D :D

[silentC]

Are you kidding? A carpet layer taking doors off? Unheard of!! He'll just bash them around with his hammer when he puts down the smooth edge. That's what I would do. ;)

[elphingirl]

We had new carpet put down in the house last week after four winters of no carpet. Lucky for them, there's only two doors actually hung in the whole house (and you can guess where they are). They had an easy job I reckon - got 90sqm done in 4 hours.

[silentC]

Just spoke to the old man. He wimped out and took all of the doors off. Lightweight!! Who's going to have to put them all back on? Muggins :rolleyes:

[bitingmidge]

Well at least you won't have too many screwdriver marks under the hinges, from where they were levered off by the carpet layers!

:D :D :D
P

[Iain]

Well at least you won't have too many screwdriver marks under the hinges, from where they were levered off by the carpet layers!

:D :D :D
P
Don't be silly Midge, they use a claw hammer:p

[Zed]

u should withhold payment to him for trying to be an @srewipe, whats he gunna do ? rip upt he carpet ? :D

god tradies can be bastards!!! no wonder a current affair and today tonight love 'em....;)

[bitingmidge]

god tradies can be bastards!!! no wonder a current affair and today tonight love 'em....;)
Golly no Zed!

This is a simple misunderstanding on the part of an ill-informed owner builder who really should get better advice before entering into a contract with a top-notch tradesman.

You see silentC, we told you there'd be tears before bedtime if you pursued this stupid owner builder thing.

Give up now before you get yourself into real trouble!!

:D :D :D
P

[ozwinner]

:eek: Laying carpet? :eek:
It would take all day to do just one wall.

Al :D

[echnidna]

Right on Midge !!!!!

[silentC]

top-notch tradesman
Pffft :rolleyes:

[The Big O]

Reminds me of an old mate who called in a carpet layer a few years ago only to subsequently find he layed more than the carpet. Cost him more than a few hundred grand and he's still living on bare boards- somewhere else. So what's a few doors.

[jmk89]

Reminds me of an old mate who called in a carpet layer a few years ago only to subsequently find he layed more than the carpet. Cost him more than a few hundred grand and he's still living on bare boards- somewhere else. So what's a few doors.

that gives a whole new meaning to carpet burns!!! Ouch!!

[silentC]

They were laying the carpet in my parent's house, so that's the old bloke's problem, not mine ;)

[damienhazo]

When I first met my German girlfriend (my German was crap and her English not much better), I asked her about German pet names - you know, pumkin, honey, luvy-wuvy. I settled on 'Schmunzel-Häschen' which translates roughly to 'Cuddle-Bunny'. She then asked me what she should call me - to which I answered, 'Rug-Muncher'.

Not really relevant to this thread I know, but it is the only thing I could think of to do with carpet.


Damien

[soundman]

Typical building industry bul581T.
Make some other bloke go out of his way to make you job easier and lie thru your teeth about the reason.
This sounds like this blokes normal story.

Now if it was all agreed that the doors would be rehung after the carpet was laid that would be fine. But that sort of thing will never hapen in the building industry.
Full steam ahead and fix the stuff ups later.

Thats why I try to avoid building sites.
When are you installing the sound system...... when everybody else is GONE.

cheers

[silentC]

I rehung the doors last night. One of them rubs a little bit.

The irony is that the hall ways are tiled and so the carpet stops just under the doors anyway.

Hey Damien, you probably haven't seen the XXXX Gold ads? There's one where this guy lobs up with a very attractive and well endowed Scandanavian girl. He tells the other guys that she can't speak english. One of the others (the dumb one) says "Doesn't speak english? Why does he go out with her?".

[damienhazo]

Hey Damien, you probably haven't seen the XXXX Gold ads?

Didn't watch any telly last time I was home so I guess that means I haven't seen a XXXX ad for...6 years. Ad sounds good so I'm guessing their marketing department is better than their brewing technicians...


Damien

[Bob38S]

...... I haven't seen a XXXX ad for...6 years. Ad sounds good so I'm guessing their marketing department is better than their brewing technicians...


Damien

And you call yourself a Queenslander? :confused::confused::confused:

[damienhazo]

And you call yourself a Queenslander? :confused::confused::confused:

I am a Queenslander who's travelled the world and settled south of Munich. Don't get me wrong Bob, but these blokes have been brewing this stuff for a lot longer than the Castlemain brewery...

[doug the slug]

I am a Queenslander who's travelled the world and settled south of Munich. Don't get me wrong Bob, but these blokes have been brewing this stuff for a lot longer than the Castlemain brewery...

and stanley have been making handplanes for a lot longer than Lie-Neilsen. ;) ;)

[silentC]

I'm guessing their marketing department is better than their brewing technicians
Yep. ;) I still wouldn't drink it though.